To My Rugrats,
“Rugrats,” the special nickname I give to two very special boys in my life. These two boys are the kids I’ve been blessed to watch over the past year. While they are just starting to learn how to read, this letter is for them… Boys, I have been babysitting you guys for about a year now and it has changed me forever. You two have taught me things I will never learn in a classroom or from any book. In the past year I have watched you grow in every way and I am so grateful and honored to be a part of your lives.
About a year ago, I was asked by your parents if I was available to babysit. They needed a regular babysitter and felt I was a good candidate. Our moms were friends, my sister used to babysit you before she went away to college, and they knew who I was. They had more faith in me than I did myself. I had never babysat before you guys strolled into my life. I had constant questions lingering my mind. What happens if you cry? What happens if you fall down and get hurt? What happens if you don’t like me? Am I mature enough for this kind of responsibility? All of these thoughts almost lead me to say no. But between both of our moms, I finally gave in and said, “Yes!” And it has been quite the journey ever since… for all of us!
Babysitting you guys for the first time was one of the most nerve wracking feelings I've ever had in my life. Reality really started to sink in when your mom kissed you guys goodbye then headed out the door, leaving me to be the “adult in charge". For a few hours, two innocent little lives depended on me. I wasn’t ready for that kind of responsibility! It felt like they left a ‘big kid’ to be in charge of ‘smaller kids’…“What kind of people leave someone like me in charge?! I’m a kid myself!” I thought to myself. After a good half hour of freaking myself out, my nerves finally started to calm down a bit. We started playing some games and I was having so much fun that I forgot I was babysitting. You guys had me laughing and smiling at all of your cute comments and adorable personalities it made me forget about how nervous I was!
BUT let's be honest for a second, not everything is sunshine and rainbows all the time. In the past year I've gotten the pleasure to know your personalities and attitudes inside and out. I know when you're having a good day, and when you're having a bad day. So some days are better than others, but on our bad days I never want you to feel I love you any less than I do on our good days. I love you guys on good or bad days just the same! You guys may drive me crazy sometimes, but I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm so proud of the two of you and how you're growing into little men. (Please stop growing!) You guys never fail to hold the door open for me or other people and I am constantly complimented at how well behaved you both are and for that I would like to thank your mom and dad! Your parents raise you to be respectful and kind and while I get to see it all the time, it really shines through for others in your manners. My little boys are turning into little men!
Over the past year, I have learned so much from you guys. I have learned how to love unconditionally in a completely different way. I have always known how to love my family and friends unconditionally, but the love I have for you two is something different. Kind of like how a mom loves their children. You guys aren’t my kids, but in a way... it feels like you are! I want nothing less than the best for you guys, love everything about you inside and out, but most of all, will always protect you. You guys may get mad at me when I say, "no" but I promise I have my reasoning's. While I may let you get away with ice cream before dinner, trust me when I say "no to something. Now physically, I would throw my life down before letting anything ever happen to yours. Emotionally, I may not be able to fight all the mean kids that come your way, but I promise I'll be waiting with a bowl of ice cream to make it all better!
Now what I’m about to tell you is not easy and it makes me sad every time I think about it. But it needs to be addressed…There will come a day when I won’t be your babysitter anymore, and nothing makes my heart heavier than knowing someone else will be taking care of my babies. While I love being your babysitter, I will be graduating from college soon and will need to enter the real world. Believe me, if I could I would babysit you guys until you were 18! But alas, all good things must come to an end! I will cherish each day I get to be your babysitter until that time comes. But I also need to tell you both something very important, "thank you." Thank you for always being the light on my darker days, but mostly; thank you for allowing me to be a part of your lives and for helping me grow into a better person in more ways than one. You will always be my kids no matter what and I love you both more than you will ever love Chuckie E. Cheese!