The thing is, Mother’s Day isn’t the day I miss you most. It’s the days when I get a good grade on an exam, when I have a good day at work, or any of the small things that happen throughout my day that make me happy. All I want to do is tell you about them. I miss you when I’m traveling home to see everyone, knowing you won’t be there to greet me with open arms. I miss you when I check my phone and don’t see a text from “Mommy” reading “Come home, I miss you, sweetbottoms.” I miss you on a beautiful, sunny day because I know you loved your warm, summer days. I miss you when I’m getting ready for a special occasion, and you aren’t there to tell me your honest mom advice. I miss addressing you as “Chris” and all your friends always wondering why the hell your daughter called you by your first name. I miss being in the car with you and belting out the song “Strong Enough” by Cher, or any Cher songs for that matter. (Sorry about the tattoo(s), I think you’d laugh about it by now.) I miss your corny jokes, bubbly personality, and big beautiful smile. I miss going home and being able to give you a huge hug on both my worst and my best days.
I’m not sure how you always made it like nothing was wrong, but you played it off well. You’d remind me that everyone has bad days, but someone is always going through something worse. I really don’t know how you kept your positive attitude through everything you were going through, but I think that’s where I get my optimism. I know I haven’t had the easiest life, but I’ve come to learn that it isn’t all that bad either. That’s because you raised me to be who I am. You taught me how to be independent and you taught me that I could never depend on anyone besides myself for my happiness. You taught me that I have to be grateful for what I have, and I will find plenty to be happy about. You taught me that if I want something, I’m going to have to work hard to get it, and that’s what I’ll do. I’ll take all of these things that you taught me in the 18 years you were here with me, and I’ll make you proud every single day.
To anyone reading this, appreciate your mother. Don’t get mad at yourself for being upset with her at times, that’s normal. I still don’t regret ever getting upset with my mom. We’re supposed to at times. But never, ever take a day with your mom for granted. She loves you and will forever want nothing but the best for you. I never thought I’d have to live my life without my mom, but here I am. It’s not easy, it probably never will be, but I am doing it. You’re stronger and capable of way more than you think you are. Celebrate your mothers not only for Mother’s Day, but every day. So, this is my tribute to my super-woman mother on Mother’s Day: have a mimosa, and enjoy your day up there. There will never be a day that passes when you aren’t a constant thought on my mind. I’ll always hold you closely and dear to my heart, and I will never forget the memories you have given me. Thank you for your strength, and thank you for your wisdom. Your memory lives on forever, I love you Mommy, Happy Mother’s Day.
