First and foremost, I am so proud of you. I’m proud of how smart you are. Proud of your fantastic report cards and the A’s you get on all your tests and that you are in all advanced classes and are one of the smartest in the whole eighth grade. I’m proud of your athletic talent. Proud that you made the football, basketball, and lacrosse teams and that you are the starting goalie on your club lacrosse team. Proud that you use your free time to practice because you want to be even better (you’re already a better athlete than me in that sense). I am proud of how kind you are. Proud when you tell me stories about you being friends with the kids with special needs at school and proud that you help Mom and Dad out around the house. I am proud of you, and I am proud to call you my brother.

That is why leaving you again is so hard. I was six years old when I found out I was going to be a big sister and I cried for months when I found out you were going to be a boy -- I wanted a sister to play dolls with. Boy, am I glad my wish didn’t come true. In the past 12 years you have gone from the little, crying creature in the room next door to one of my best friends. You make me laugh harder than anyone else, you keep my secrets, and you are always my biggest fan.

So I am sorry that I am missing out on this part of your life while you were there for this part of mine. I wish I could go to every middle school football game and sit there in the freezing cold watching you because I know you did that for my lacrosse games. I wish I was home when you came in the front door announcing your straight A’s to Mom and Dad because I know you had to listen to me do that. I wish I was there to pick you up from lacrosse practice and take you for Slurpees at midnight and go for bike rides and go to the beach and mess with Mom and Dad and do countless of other things I had always wished I had a big sibling to do with me. And you have me, but I’m sorry now you only have me for the summers.

I hope you know how hard it was for me to decide to go to college 11 hours away form you. To know I would miss the everyday life of you growing up. I hope you don’t think I chose school over you because I didn’t. I chose school because of you. Because I want you to see that you can do whatever you want to do if you set your mind to it and work hard. I want to show you to not be scared to step out of your comfort zone and try something completely new. I want to show you that if you follow His lead, God will bring you to do incredible things. So please don’t be mad at me as I go back to school. Don’t be sad that I’m leaving you alone. Just FaceTime me when Mom is making you crazy and text me funny pictures of Dad and I’ll be home before you know it. I love you, dude.