Growing up we all have that special relationship with a family member that is like no one else. It's the people who you cannot wait to go see, especially with the spoiling you know you will receive when you get there. Though for me I still had that excitement but there was never any spoiling of material items. And that was okay. And now that you are no longer here with us, it always makes me look back and think how thankful I am that I was able to base this relationship solely on the love you shared with me.

My grandma was more than the mother to my mother, but she was truly a role model in every aspect of my life. Going to her house wasn't about the elaborate games or toys she might have had because really she didn't have any. It wasn't about the pool in her back yard because she lived in a very small house. It wasn't about her amazing cooking because well, to be honest, she couldn't cook at all.

But it was about how genuinely happy she was to see me and how just by her facial expressions alone I could tell that these few hours or maybe even days would be the highlight of her week. I can remember vividly anytime I saw her she would open the door and hug me as tight as she could, but she was about 5 ft so when she hugged me I always had my arms almost around her head.

My grandma at times was my best friend. Even though she was obviously older and born in more judgmental times she did not carry those ways of her past with her. She was not "old school" like many other grandparents. Instead she was very open and honest with people when giving advice. She had such a big and gracious heart and honestly never said anything bad about anyone no matter if that had done something wrong by her or not. She was very big on forgiveness. Though she made it clear to anyone around her that if anyone every need a couch to sit on with a glass of pepsi and just someone to listen, she would be there. I cannot thank her enough for showing me that side of her that so many people do not have, and that's the quality that so many people respected about her. One thing that you would always here her neighbors say about her is that Lorraine is a good friend, and she was there when we really needed someone.

My grandma was not able to drive for most of my life. Not because she was physically unable, but she was just a really bad driver. So when we wanted her to come to our house and stay with us that meant one of us had to go get her. So when I was able to drive I always volunteered myself, and those drives were such great moments. We would talk and gossip, sing, and she would even try to tell me I was a good singer when everyone who has ever heard me sing knows I'm pretty much tone deaf. But she just loved to be around me that she tried to give me encouragement in anyway that she could.

Lastly my grandma made it extremely clear to everyone around her that I was one of her favorite people. She would constantly show anyone who was in her house pictures of me from when I was a baby to my senior pictures. She was always bragging about me to anyone who would listen. She would always say, " Look at my granddaughter how pretty she is, did you know she's going to school to be a teacher?" It's not like I was going into the most prestigious career ( even though if you ask me personally I may say it is) but she was so proud of me for anything in my life I was accomplishing. She would always tell me how I was her favorite. Though I think a huge part of that came from the fact that I lived with her at many different points in my life. Even when I lived out of state in elementary school every summer I would come and stay with her for two months. Just me and her, and sometimes I really wish I could go back to those simpler but very precious days.

Now that you have been gone for a few years now sometimes I can't help but look back at the ways you shaped me into who I am today. You gave me my stubbornness, you always told me to be nicer to my mother, you showed me forgiveness and why not to hold grudges against people, but most importantly you showed me over whelming amounts of love and praise. You're someone who will never be forgotten in my life and is missed every single day. Though I am glad that I have the most amazing guardian angel watching over me.

I hope that everyone has had time to or will have time to enjoy the love a grandparent or grandparents can give. Do not take your time with them for granted because it is really precious and time sensitive, they will not be here forever. And even if they are already gone, still take the time to always remember the time you did have with them and how special it was. I am thankful for all the grandparents I have but I'm even more thankful for the one that will always be in my heart, and the one that my middle name is after. Lorraine Sparks will be a person that everyone will always miss because of how influential she was on all the lives she touched.

12-6-14 <3