Tuesday, October 10 was World Mental Health Day. The World Federation for Mental Health, a mental health organization recognized in more than 150 countries, created World Mental Health Day in 1992 as a way to raise awareness, educate, and fight the stigmas surrounding mental illness.
World Mental Health Day is a very important day to me. In 2015, I lost a friend to suicide. There were a few warning signs, but when you’re 16, you don’t think much of them. We didn’t see your on and off drinking or the depressing comments that you’d make every so often as anything more than teenage angst.
I’m sorry that we didn’t see certain behaviors as indicators of an underlying problem. We thought that you were just unhappy with certain aspects of your life, and as wrong as we may have been, that that was just your way of coping. We didn’t realize that it meant anything serious, and I’m truly sorry for that. However, I also know that you wouldn’t want us to blame ourselves. I’ll admit, there are days where it’s hard not to blame myself, but I know I have to push those thoughts to the side.
To all of us, you were so kind, happy, funny, and full of life. You always knew how to make us laugh when we were feeling down, and I remember how much fun you were to be around. You were genuinely such a good person, and I miss you every day.
Last month would’ve marked your 20th birthday. My heart stops when I look at the calendar and realize that another year has passed without you. I miss you more and more as each year goes by.
I remember once during a rehearsal for our school play, you and I went outside to take pictures of the sunset. At your funeral, months later, I looked outside and there was one of the most beautiful sunsets I had ever seen. It was as if you were there with me. Sometimes now when I see pretty sunsets, my heart stops and I start to cry. They say time makes things easier, and it does, but not a day will go by where I don’t miss you.
As I sit here proofreading this, I’m beginning to cry. I miss you, your friends miss you, the community misses you, and most importantly, your family misses you. You were so kind, so smart, so sweet, so funny… you had so much going for you.
You taught me so much, and I can’t thank you enough. You showed me how worth it life truly is, even it can get rough and life doesn’t always go our way. You also taught me to be kind to everyone, even when I face rough times. I am so thankful to have had you in my life, even though it was only for a short time.
I can’t wait to see you again one day, I love and miss you terribly.
Love, your friends and family who would do anything to have you back.
Mental illness is NOT something to take lightly. It is not “just a phase,” or something someone grows out of. Just because you can’t see mental illness doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist. Suicide is a symptom of untreated mental illness, just as death is a symptom of a terminal illness, and it’s time to end the stigma.
Mental illness is in no way, shape, or form uncommon, even though one may think it to be. 18.5% of adults in the U.S. experience mental illness in a given year, and suicide is the third leading cause of death in those aged 10 to 24.
If you or a loved one are experiencing suicidal thoughts, here are some great resources:
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255
- Crisis Call Center: (775) 784-8090 OR text "ANSWER" to 839863
- Crisis Text Line: HOME to 741741
- Carruth Center at West Virginia University: (304) 293-4431
- Visit http://www.suicide.org/suicide-hotlines.html to find hotlines specific to your location or situation, or to learn more about suicide prevention.
