Don't be sorry. Don't ever say sorry for being independent.
I'm that girl that refuses to let anyone do anything for me. To pay for me, to drive for me, to tell me what to do, anything– I like doing it all myself. I'm a very stubborn girl, and I won't give in to peer pressure, and I won't give up any of my beliefs. And I won't apologize for that.
I came from a household of two older brothers, and being the only girl I learned to be very independent. I learned to do everything myself, and I liked it that way. I'm strong minded and have my own beliefs, and I wont back down from them or give in just to come to an agreement, although I know this causes conflicts (I'm working on it).I grew up and was taught to not rely on anyone. I'm that girl that loves to do all the work in a group project because I know it gets done,or the girl who will drive everyone to know that we will get there. I love being independent and on my own time, but I, myself, know all the struggles that come with it as well.
Recently when I first entered into a relationship, it was so weird to let myself have someone else to consider in my life. When I first started dating my boyfriend, my best friend and I were out eating with him, and the waiter asked how the checks were, and I said all separate, not even thinking about it. My boyfriend said, "No, we're together," and I kept arguing saying, "No, I can pay for myself." My best friend then said, "Why don't you let him pay for you?" I replied without even thinking about it, "I don't need him to pay for me, I have the money I can pay for myself." This is just an instinct I have– to be able to pay for myself and not needing him to pay for me. I know he doesn't think I expect him to pay for me, but he just wanted to be nice and pay for me.
I'm stubborn, strong headed, and independent, and I will not apologize for it, but I'm working on it. So if you are like me, know that it's OK to not rely on anyone, to want to do it yourself. Just know there are people who love you and who just want to help you. It's OK to give in and be vulnerable sometimes, (heck I'm still learning) but I'm trying. But, don't feel as you have to apologize for being independent or feel you have to change. Just compromise sometimes.
