5 Tips For Loving Someone With A Different Love Language Than You
Start writing a post
Swoon

5 Tips For Loving Someone With A Different Love Language Than You

You don't have to speak the same language to get your love on.

4007
5 Tips For Loving Someone With A Different Love Language Than You

According to "The Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate" by Gary Chapman, there are five main ways, or what he coined 'love languages', that people display and like to receive love through. The five 'languages' are quality time, words of affirmation, receiving gifts, physical touch, and acts of service.

Since there are five categories, the chances that you and a partner will have different love languages are pretty high, and actually, I myself am in a relationship where my boyfriend and I don't share love languages. Learning how to make our relationship work when he's someone who receives love mostly by physical touch and I love mostly by gift-giving/receiving has been hard. I can proudly say though that after almost four years of being together, we have it mostly figured out.

To help those of you who are in the same boat as my boyfriend and I, I made a list of some of the things we did that helped our relationship stay strong despite speaking different languages.

1. Learn about each others love language

If you haven't yet, take the quiz. After you've both taken it, take some time to learn about what each other's results mean. Look up different things to do for them, how to communicate best with them, etc., and once you're both done, have a conversation about what you learned. You might be surprised to find out how much they agree/disagree with what the internet says about their love language.

2. Let each other know what it is that you need to feel loved

It's one thing to know someone's love language, but it's another to know exactly what that means for them. Maybe their love language is words of affirmation, but they appreciate hearing "I'm proud of you" rather than "you're doing a good job", and know those things can make or break a relationship. Really get to know what truly speaks to your partners love language; it will make all the difference.

3. Tell them when they're doing something right

You might think it is overkill to tell your partner each time they do something for you that truly speaks to your love language, but it's not. Letting them know that whatever they did was good, rather than just smiling/saying thank you, it makes it so your reaction isn't left up for interpretation. Instead, since you directly told them how you felt, they know that what they did was right and that they should do it again.

4. Learn that it's OK to compromise

Already, relationships require compromise from both parties, but when you're in a relationship with someone who speaks a different love language than you, you might have to compromise a little more. You're both going to have to take some time to understand just how the other wants to be loved which means you'll probably end up sacrificing a little bit of how you like to be loved. All that should matter is that at the end of the day, you've both been trying your hardest.

5. Don't be too hard on yourself

You are going to slip up and give them way too many Christmas presents when they hate gifts, and that is alright, because I'm sure your partner hasn't been perfect either. Remember, a relationship is about growing and learning together, not losing who you are for someone else. Your partner will start to love the small things you do for them that speak to your love language, and not theirs, and that is truly what love is about.

Report this Content

The idea to spin Ammona Ghanem's household staple of black seed oil in to a clean, luxury haircare brand might have been her dad's idea, but it was she who made it the luxury brand it is today.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

3 Things I'm Leaving In 2020—And You Should, Too

And 3 words to sum it up - What. A. Year.

20663
Photo by Zoritsa Valova on Unsplash

This year has been a dumpster fire.

I think we all will collectively have PTSD from this horrid and heartbreaking year. 2020 was so different than anyone expected. It broke hearts, grew frustrations, and taught us some awful lessons.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

15 Local Coral Springs Restaurants To Support While You’re Home From College

With Coral Springs offering so many big chain options, its easy to forget the local chains and mom and pop joints that are worth checking out while you're home.

10448

I love coming home from school for many reasons, one of them being home-cooked meals. However, there is a handful of places that are only in C. Springs that I have to have while I am home. I could go pro in ordering takeout, and this list is curated in my semi-professional opinion. In no particular order, here are 15 of my favorite spots in Coral Springs, FL:

Keep Reading... Show less
Photo by Nothing Ahead from Pexels
One of the most common mental health disorders is Bipolar I and II, in fact around 3 million people each year are diagnosed. And while mental health is being pushed into the spotlight even more there is still quite a bit of stigma circulating around it, and with Bipolar Disorder this is even more true due to the nature of how it is constantly presented in the media, whether it be on the news or even in films. So, what is Bipolar Disorder? And what are the manic and depressive episodes like?

* I am not a licensed therapist therefor do not take this article as medical advice. If you or someone you love is needing help please seek a licensed therapist.

Not many are aware that there are two different phases that revolve around bipolar disorder, they are manic and depressive. What are they? How would you classify them? What are the symptoms of the phases? These are the most common questions regarding these two phases, and quite honestly it can be hard to pinpoint them from an outsider who is not aware of how to spot if their loved one is going into either phase.

Keep Reading... Show less

From the outside, I am a healthy college student. However, what you don't see when you sit next to me in class or pass me on campus is my struggle with body dysmorphia. This has been an issue since my early teenage years, and while I've grown in confidence and self-care, I'm not perfect.

Keep Reading... Show less

I recently found myself reflecting on what advice I had received and offered while navigating young adulthood. I think the impact that a few wise words can have is immense, and so I thought that I would take to social media to find what words of wisdom have helped get everyone to where they are now, whether that be a point in school, life, their career, etc.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

21 Crafting Ideas To Inspire Every Artist In 2021

Whether you have immense free time this year or want to try something new, here are 21 new art project ideas to occupy your time and interests during the new year.

2221

As COVID-19 continues to plague society, spend some of your increased time at home crafting away at different art projects. Here are 21 different ideas to try throughout the new year. From balloon dart painting to chunky blanket making, there is an artistic hobby for everyone!

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

This Is Your Ideal Bath And Body Works Scent Based On Your Zodiac Sign

With the holiday season ending and the semi annual sales beginning, let's get in the mood to smell the best meanwhile keeping it fun.

1579
Photo from Bath and Body Works

Bath and Body Works always has a decent sale going on, whether it's buy three get three free or 50-75% off popular items or certain body care items. I can't be the only one who could spend hours in the stores investigating every possible scent trying to find the perfect match. There is a number of scents to choose from and it varies between each type of item whether it is a moisturizing body lotion, shower gel, or hand sanitizer.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments