Saying 'Goodbye' Can Be The Best Decision You'll Ever Make

I have never liked change if it was for the worst. And a majority of the time, any moments in my life that exhibited change were often bad. See how that works?

When things stay the same for me, it tells me that my life is balanced, that I'm surrounded by everything and everyone I've ever loved, that life couldn't get any better than where we are right now. For the past couple of years, it has seemed that my life is revolving around change.

For the first time, there have been positive results.

Graduating high school: For someone who imagined they'd be crying during the ceremony from start to finish and visiting whenever they were home on break, I didn't shed a tear and haven't set foot on my school's property since throwing our caps into the air. Although I miss my classmates more than anything, and the atmosphere of walking through the halls being surrounded by childhood friends, I don't have an overwhelming desire to go back.

With this attitude, I'm able to push high school aside and welcome my new surroundings at college. Learning to take on basic adult responsibilities, becoming more active/losing unwanted weight, and striving to push myself out of my comfort zone are few of the many positive aspects I have taken from being on campus.

Moving: This summer, my family and I moved out of my childhood home to a new home a couple towns over. I knew this would be my biggest obstacle to overcome, mentally and physically, since leaving for college last fall. As weird as it is driving past my old street, I've embraced my new home, and I've finally come to the realization of the healthier life we are living there.

And last but not least, crushes. For nearly my entire high school career, I had the same crush. I wrote a letter to him at the end of senior year expressing how I felt, wishing him the best in college and beyond. Since then, we have met up once, and texted occasionally. To go even further, it's been over a year since meeting up, and our text messages consisted of failed attempts at me trying to plan future meetups.

This especially is the biggest form of growth I have seen in myself. The first person who I loved from the bottom of my heart has shown me, in several ways, that seeing each other again was not the greatest idea to go through with. For one year, I kept pushing, trying so hard to have us become closer, in hope that something more would occur.

At the start of a new school year, I've decided the time has come. While my feelings towards him obviously haven't disappeared, I've recognized that saying goodbye may be a huge step in helping me move forward into bigger and better things that life has to offer for me. In some ways, being able to look back on this crush as a wonderful past memory is sentimental, the kind that brings joy.

I am very eager to continue my personal growth, and if that means saying goodbye to the things I've cherished most in life? So be it. Many of these decisions have benefited me thus far, so let's hope the future will comply.