I am just about three weeks out from the Natural Northern in Cleveland. THREE FREAKING WEEKS. It's so hard to believe that it is so soon already. This week has been very tough for me and has taken a really big toll on me. Nothing makes you discouraged more than stepping on the scale and seeing those numbers go up. You diet for 15+ weeks straight and then when it comes down to the final weeks you no longer feel like you're making progress... Oh how these things work.
I have three weeks to pull it together three weeks to kill my diet and my lifts is it enough time? I sure as hell hope so. I really wanted to throw in the towel earlier this week. I wanted so badly to call it quits. Honestly, I was at that point where I did not think I was cut out for this. I saw all my friends enjoying their nights out while I laid in bed binge watching Netflix. I just keep telling myself "Hey at least you're not waking up with a hangover." But then I thought to myself you're right not everyone is cut out for this but YOU are and YOU will get up on that stage in three weeks and let all of your hard work show off.
Just a little insider people think that competing is so easy to do. They think that anyone can do it. Oh, how you are so wrong. It is not for everyone and not everyone can do it. I haven't even stepped on stage yet and I have already learned so much about this competing world. It takes a lot of mental and emotional strain on you which again no one tells you. No one tells you how exhausted you'll feel and how defeated you will feel. I have had one heck of a prep that's for sure. I'm battling a few hardships right now but I won't let its stop me from achieving this goal.
Competing has always been a huge goal of mine. I'm not giving up on it. I refuse to let myself give up. I have already come so far to this day. Your mind is so powerful. If you think negative thoughts negative things will happen. Of course, you are going to think you don't look great. Even the most "fit" person in the world thinks he/she could look better.
"If it doesn't challenge you it doesn't change you"-Fred DeVito
"Challenges are what make life interesting, and overcoming them is what makes life meaningful." - Joshua J. Marine
^^This challenge, this journey has never been about a stage and a bikini, it's been about the process and the challenge of it. It's been about testing myself physically and mentally. It's about picking a goal and sticking to it.
So here's to thinking about the positives, here's to telling myself daily that I will get up on that stage and rock it. Here's to kicking my diet lifts and cardio into another gear for the next three weeks. Here's to telling myself I will be lean enough to fit in my suit and I will enjoy my time while meeting a bunch of other fitness junkies who enjoy the same lifestyle I do. I would not have made it this far into prep without the support from my close friends and my family. I've realized what an isolating journey this can be and all of your encouraging words are so helpful and much needed!
