Women are amazing, magical, and multi-dimensional creatures. Most of my living icons are women. Some of them are political, literary, philanthropic, and on-screen figures; while others are friends, professors, and family members of mine. They're geographically scattered both in residence and origin, so their experiences growing up vastly differ from my own. They vary in age and professional interests, hobbies, musical tastes, and even approaches toward people. In fact, the sole thing they all share in common is their personal identification as women.
This isn't to say that I don't admire or befriend anyone who identifies as a man, but I need to bring special attention to the women in my life, in whatever capacity, because of how they've each managed to embolden me in different ways throughout my life when I've most needed it, whether or not I realized it at the time. I'm going to shed some light on this subject of women and their wonder because I feel like people are losing sight of why it's so important to appreciate the qualities of women that the public has a tendency to discredit in various ways.
1. Women are physically tough as hell.
Most of us go through some pretty painful stuff on a regular basis and still manage to persevere in a society that is fundamentally stacked against us. For example, about three to seven days a month, we go through our menstrual cycle. This whole "once a month women PMS" BS does not nearly encompass what type of back aching process this is. For one thing, "once a month" makes periods sound like they last a day when they normally last up to a week. Second, that week is spent bleeding from a place no one wants to bleed from, popping pain killers for cramps and back pains, and probably feeling either nauseous or dizzy for hours at a time. Now remember, in college, you only get up to two excused absences for a class - per semester. But we go to class when we feel like there's an alien trying to rip it's way through our vaginas anyway - because that's what we have to do to succeed in this society.
2. Women are emotionally thick-skinned.
This society is not just systematically stacked against women, but on a day-to-day level, America has bred a culture of violence against us. Personally speaking on behalf of myself and the women that grew up with me in NYC, catcalling was the just one level of the sexual harassment we dealt with from a young age. Cowards find nothing wrong with stalking women on the street, groping them in alleyways, driving up to them to say disgustingly aggressive things as they walk innocently down the sidewalk, and abusing their positions of authority to demean young women into objects rather than active subjects of their own lives. In addition to this day to day harassment, women are regularly raped, sexually assaulted, or beaten. Mothers and daughters from my community faced beatings as I was growing up only to be shamed into silence and friends and loved ones came back from parties with horror stories of date rape. This is a regular occurrence for millions of women every day - and we get absolutely no credit for the emotional strength it takes not to let that violent atmosphere scare us into hiding.
The women I watched got through these physically tormenting situations handled themselves like the heroes that don't make it onto the big screen. They found emotional support through friends and family and created resources of physical support and safety for one another as a result. Instead of cowering in fear and running from the very human evils in their lives, they fought back in their own ways, in smart ways, that enabled them to build creative and fulfilling lives of their own. They learned how to keep the demons that tried to push them into the ground out of their lives and created productive and relatively safe environments for themselves. I can't tell you exactly why women don't get credit for this astounding level of emotional strength - but I do know that I'm sick and tired of hearing day-to-day stereotypes about women's weaknesses when I'm so fully aware of how far from the truth they are.
3. Despite the one-dimensional expectation that society pushes on women to beautiful and nothing else, women find a way to be beautifully intelligent for no one but themselves.
As of 2016, women make up a greater percentage of college and university level institutions than men, despite the fact that we were denied an education for decades; we not only headline the fashion industry as models but also as entrepreneurs; we are writing best-selling novels and working behind the scenes of America's most prestigious publications; we are leading the music industry and managing some of the most influential artists in the industry; and despite the business world's determination to keep women within lower ranks, we are running successful companies anyway. Not only are women kicking ass in all of these amazing ways and more - but we manage to make our marks on the world with our own, unique and individual styles of beauty as we do it.
If the only people that read this are my closest friends and family, that wouldn't be nearly the disappointment people might expect it to be. I hope those that read this truly understand the strength they hold inside of them, in case they weren't already aware. This lack of awareness is too common - and it's because society refuses to acknowledge it. But I am acknowledging it and I hope that each of my readers go on to spread the word; because women need to be praised more often for how wonderfully strong, multidimensional, and supportive they are.
