I bet if I read the syllabus, I would never have to go to class during syllabus week.

1. Do I have to print out every syllabus?

This place asks too much of me.

2. How important is the first day?

Wise words, Ellen, wise words.

3. I guess I'll go to class, I need to find out how many days I can skip and if there is a final in this class.

Only one unexcused absent? Excuse me??

4. Google Maps TOLD me that it takes 15 minutes to get from class A to class B. I only have 10 minutes to do it in.

I'm fine. Really. If you see a student running past you looking like she is dying, it's fine. She is me.

5. Am I in the right class??

Guess I'll find out, hopefully soon.

6. Whoops, forgot to buy the "required texts"

Will I ever read them? No. Will I end up spending $500 because of my professor pressuring me to buy books? Yes.

7. "We have to go over this because I know that none of y'all will read the syllabus," — every professor on syllabus week.

I mean... they're right.

8. Two words that can kill me: group. projects.

9. This 8 a.m. class is the biggest mistake I've made.

Curse this professor who only teaches this class I need to graduate, and only teaches it at this time.

10. Let's try that whole 'sleeping with eyes open' thing

I feel like I'm sooo close to mastering it.

11. WAIT. WHY ARE YOU TEACHING?!?!?

It's called syllabus week for a reason.