The Thoughts of a Server on Valentine's Day | The Odyssey Online
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The Thoughts of a Server on Valentine's Day

The real hero on Valentine's isn't your lover, it's the person serving you.

Gracey Murphy
Feb 08, 2016
University of Iowa
14
The Thoughts of a Server on Valentine's Day

For all those blossoming short and long term relationships, Valentine's day is the most romantic time of the year. You may get each other nice presents, go to a movie and have a fancy dinner. But for the servers of the year, this day is composed of annoying couples and lots of stress. These are the thoughts swarming your (slightly cynical) server's mind on Valentine's day.


1. I wish I was out with my significant other. Or had a significant other.

I'm sooo happy watching others having a totally romantic time on this holiday while we have to abide by each of their demands. What a perfect way to spend the day.

2. Damn this guy is attractive.

Maybe he's out with his sister?

Ha, who am I kidding. They're probably married with 57 children.

3. Do you have to gloat and order wine?

I want to be at home drinking wine and crying about my loneliness. Why do you have to spoil it for the rest of us?

4. I hope you choke on your happiness. And your appetizer.

Yeah yeah, the stuffed mushrooms are delicious and you're SO happy...we get it.

5. PLEASE DON'T PROPOSE.

That would be the worst scenario to happen on Valentine's day. If you propose, I swear I'll pour Pinot Noir all over your new button-up.

6. Stop smiling at me.

Usually I'd appreciate it, but today it seems condescending. Just eat your lobster and get out of my section.

7. I wish I could sit down.

Valentine's day is so busy. So many people are in love and want to eat food. And I'm here running from table to table trying to make yours and everybody else's day "extra special."

8. Did you just say "I love you" for an eleventh time?

Excuse me while I vomit.

9. ANOTHER glass of wine?

Now you're really rubbing it in.

10. Seriously? You're exchanging your presents HERE?

Ooo a nice watch and some stunning earrings. Don't mind me, I'll just be in the back room sobbing.

11. I can't wait to go home.

Netflix and chocolate is all I need to keep me satisfied. Well, that and red wine. Please let me leave.

12. Ugh that chocolate cake looks delightful.

I haven't eaten all day because it has been so busy... they probably wouldn't miss this measly bite.

13. I will punch these lovebirds if they don't tip me well.

I'm already sad and alone. I don't want to be poor too.

14. HOLY SH*T. THAT'S A BIG CHECK.

Where do people even get this kind of money?!

15. At least I know I'm making bank tonight.

AND I DON'T HAVE TO SPEND IT ON ANYONE ELSE. TAKE THAT, ADORABLE COUPLES.

16. BEST VALENTINE'S DAY EVER.


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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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