So, you went out last night and you had one too many drinks.
Sure, you promised yourself and your friends that you were only going to have "like two drinks" because you "have to be up early the next day."
That ~may~ have been your intention but you got to the party and there was free juice and beer, you started playing stack cup (a game you're REALLY not great at) which led to flip cup (also not your strongest suit), and you saw your ex from Sigma Apple Pi with his new girl and against your better judgment, instead of leaving the situation, your already intoxicated self decided to down two extra shots "for liquid courage" to go and confront that little playboy. Right as you tap him on the shoulder, you blackout.
The next thing you know, it's morning. And now you're hungover.
But don't feel bad! We've all had those mornings. The morning where you might have a few of the following thoughts...
1. "Ugh who turned on the sun"
2. "What time is it? Where's my phone? How the heck did I get home?"
3. *Tries to get up*
"Whoa, nope there's a 10-pound brick in my head"
4. *Phone is on 4%* *groans*
5. *Opens phone to find 13 missed calls, 29 text messages, and 18 unopened Snapchats*
"Oh. No. No, no, no, no who did I talk to? Did I talk to my ex???"
6. *Sees full but illiterate conversation with four different people including your ex* "NOOOOOOO"
7. "Why is my Snap story literally 5 minutes long? Who's that in it? Am I wall twerking???"
8. *Starts deleting snap story*
9. "OK. On the count of three, get up... one, two, two and a half, three"
10. *Finally gets up and immediately gets nauseous*
"That was a mistake"
11. *Runs to the bathroom*
12. *Throws up in the toilet for a solid 9 heaves while head is still pounding*
13. *Looks in the mirror to see last nights makeup smudged all over your face and your once-cute outfit covered in blood stains, mud, and dried alcohol*
14. "I'm a garbage person"
15. *Stumbles to the kitchen for water and Advil*
16. Roommate who has her life together: "Oh good, you're alive"
Well, kind of.
17. *Grumble something about never drinking again as you down the pills and about eight glasses of water*
18. You to everyone you went out with: "What the heck happened last night?"
19. *Gets 14 different versions of what you did last night*
20. *Tries to piece together how the rest of the night went*
21. "I booty called WHO???"
Mistakes were made.
22. "I gotta drop out of school now"
23. *Dry heaves another four times*
24. "God, why me?"
25. *Cancel any and all plans for the rest of the day in order to recover*
26. *Takes another Advil*
27. *Hangover shower*
28. "I'm never drinking again"
Roommates: "You say that every time you get drunk"