“Grades aren’t everything.”
That’s what I texted my friend to encourage her as we bid last quarter goodbye. It rolled off my fingers so naturally, back when my own GPA was still polished and flawless.
Not so the next morning when my final grades were adjusted and I found myself staring at a few numbers on the screen that devastated the rest of my day. They laughed in my face, mocking me: “What are you going to do about us now?”
I’d always associated myself with good grades, so the blow hit hard. It took me the whole day just to come to grips with the fact that my GPA isn’t perfect anymore.
Grades aren’t everything.
It sure is a lot easier to type than to say aloud.
And boy, is it easier to say than to internalize.
I knew it was true. There were so many things I thought I knew…
My identity is bound up in Christ.
He is all I will ever need.
I am nothing apart from His saving work on the cross.
Any earthly success I achieve is only because of His grace.
A handful of numbers does not define me.
I knew all this. It’s just hard to believe it in the moment.
The Lord calls us to work hard. He commands us to throw our hearts into everything we do. He approves diligence and warns against sluggishness. No problem, God. I’ve always had a strong work ethic.
Yet somewhere in the process of trying to do my best, I’d confused academic success with personal worth. I figured that if I got a low grade, that meant I wasn’t diligent enough.
Education should draw us closer to God as we learn more about His world and use that knowledge to make a difference for His glory. Sadly, our competitive school system seems more of a soul-squelcher. And in a godless society, intellectualism often distances us from God as we become our own god figures, those independent high-achievers who blindly proclaim that rationalism and religion are mutually exclusive.
It’s the Tower of Babel all over again.
And when I focus more on maintaining a GPA than on giving glory to the One who created the universe, I’m worshipping a false god. Yes, a decimal number on a 4-point scale. What a foolish choice of an idol!
I’m so thankful for my broken GPA. I’m glad God humbled me in this way. And, to tell you the truth, it’s freeing to have that expectation severed from my identity.
Life is too short to spend preening my self-image when I could be recklessly radiating Christ.
We could be sprinkling hope within a depressed system.
We could be infusing truth into a misdirected culture.
We could be breathing love to the souls around us.
The less we worry about ourselves, the more our gaze will pivot outwards. The more our lives reflect the gospel, the less we’ll care about how the world sees us.
As I begin a new quarter of school, I’m prayerfully determined not to let my academic performance consume my life. Yes, I will continue to work hard. And I know I’ll still struggle with pride. But my deepest desire is to focus on things above, on the truths that will matter for eternity.
“And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.” ~ 2 Corinthians 5:15
Let’s pray that He would consume the pettiness in our lives, setting us ablaze for His kingdom.
