I Want You To Choose Happiness

I Want You To Choose Happiness

We decide what makes us happy.

If there is one thing in my life that I have decided to do, it would be to choose happiness. I deserve to be happy, and you do too. I am the only one that can decide what truly makes me happy. I should not have to justify what makes me happy to anyone. Whether it be school, work, friends, or family, I have the power to decide what affects my happiness.I want to encourage everyone to find what makes them happy and run with it. Keep working to achieve genuine happiness. Do I think happiness can be achieved overnight? Well, it depends on the situation. Happiness can gradually start happening, or it can happen all at once. When I started choosing my happiness, all other aspects of my life started to fall into place.

The first step in choosing happiness is surrounding your life with people who make you happy. That means you might have to cut ties with certain people, or take that leap of faith and try to bring someone into your life who will make you happy. When I finally started to be happy was when I decided to stop having certain people in my life. I had family members who never cared about how I was doing, or what was going on in my life.

When I was younger, all I wanted was for them to acknowledge me, and all of my accomplishments. As I grew older, I decided to stop going to family gatherings and started to focusing on myself. Once I focused on my happiness and started focusing on the family that actually made me happy, life was good. I am not telling you to cut all of the people out of your life who make you sad at times, but you need to know that it is okay to let go. You deserve to be happy and take whatever steps necessary to make that happiness happen.

The same goes for friends. If there is a person you consider a friend, and they do not make you happy, make a move and get that negativity out of your life. There is no rule stating you have to remain friends with someone the rest of your life. People grow up, and people change. You are not forced to remain friends with someone. Friends are supposed to support you and encourage you to be the best person you can be. If you have a friend who doesn't make you happy, then they are not a friend worthy of your friendship.

If a job or school doesn't make you happy, then do whatever it takes to find happiness. I am a junior in college, and I have attended three different colleges. Yes, that is a bit much, but I took the necessary steps to make me happy. I went to community college my freshmen year, and the college did make me happy. But it didn’t offer the courses I needed for my degree. I thought I had it all figured out when I decided to transfer to a big, public Michigan college. I was dead set on obtaining my degree from there. As the year went on, I found myself coming home every night on the verge of tears. I was so unhappy with this particular college. The courses made me sad, the teachers made me sad, and the cost of tuition made me really sad.

I decided to make a change, and change to actually be happy in college. After my sophomore year, I transferred back to a private college in Indiana. I chose to finally be happy. It was a risky move to transfer to another college, but the risk was worth my happiness. Now, I love my classes, my professors, and well, I can't really control the whole tuition thing.

I urge you to make the necessary moves to help you achieve happiness. If you are unhappy with a job, make a change. Quit if you have to. You do not deserve to wake up every morning and go to a job that makes you miserable. We only have one life, and we need to make the most of it. One shitty job should not define the rest of your life. It could be time to make a change in career or go back to school to earn a degree. I cannot promise that it will be easy, and I cannot promise that it will be worth it in the end, but I can promise you that you will never know if you don't try. You may struggle at times, and you may fall down, but use your happiness to pick you back up. Think of the ultimate goal: your happiness.

As you make your way through life, I want you to choose your happiness. I want you to find what genuinely makes you happy. Whether that be a job, a school, or a person. Find that special something that makes you happy, and don't let go. But if that something ever decides to make you unhappy, you need to know you can let it go. You deserve whatever it may be that makes you happy. These are our lives. We decide what makes us happy. We do not have to justify to anyone why something makes us happy. So, I encourage all of you to choose happiness.
Cover Image Credit: Brittany Schmidt

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it


Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

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It's 2019, And I Can Confirm One Size Does Not Fit All, At All

I'll take feeling good over meeting your standards. Thank you.


We live in a society where being yourself and expressing who you truly are is something that is becoming more and more accepted and is actually trendy. Left and right, people are coming forward and declaring who they are and want to be in life and there is a crowd of people there to cheer them on.

There is also always that small percent sitting in the corner, ready to throw derogatory comments and taint the self-love, respect, and acceptance that's flowing.

Every single time this happens, the internet breaks and feuds form in the comment sections. How many times does this fight have to be had before people just mind their own business? How someone looks is frankly none of your concern. Whether you think the person is too fat, too skinny, too girly, too rough, too whatever, it's none of your business.

I'm a firm believer that one should focus on their own life instead of living to tear others down. You should be more concerned with feeling good in your own body than wasting your energy trying to make people ashamed of theirs. It's not your place to comment on someone's appearance.

We should work on building up confidence and feeling good in our skin. Exercising, working on your mental health, and surrounding yourself with good energy will improve your life exponentially. DO NOT do this to achieve an aesthetic or try to look like an Instagram model. Only do it to feel good about yourself internally. What you look like on the outside should only matter to you.

I would be lying if I said I didn't fall victim to countless beautiful women who post their swimsuit photos looking like they stepped out of Vogue magazine. I would be lying if I said I didn't struggle with my own body image and have to remind myself daily that it's okay to not fit their mold. I won't lie to you. We live in a world that feels the need to comment on every inch of our skin rather than focus on more important issues. Shut off the noise and ignore the words that are given in hate. You have better things to do than focus on their negativity.

Make your own mold.

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