Thinking You Know Enough To Have Control Of Your Own Life Is Just An Illusion

Thinking You Know Enough To Have Control Of Your Own Life Is Just An Illusion, But The Tears On Your Pillow At Night Are Real

David Gibson drops some serious truth bombs.


"So you think you've got wisdom? You think you've got your life in order, got it nailed down – you think you understand how the world works? If death and destruction come knocking on your door on a Tuesday morning completely out of the blue, if the doctor tells you that your own end is near or the phone rings with heartbreaking news, then at that moment you will realize the control you thought you had over life was just self-deception. Thinking you know enough to have control of your own life is just an illusion, but the tears on your pillow at night are real. When we try to get a fully satisfying handle on how things work, we discover that wisdom seems to live on the other side of the world. We chase it, but we just can't get the full measure of it."

Photo by Sam Headland

David Gibson, a pastor in Scotland, wrote an incredibly thought-provoking book, "Living Life Backward: How Ecclesiastes Teaches Us to Live in Light of the End." I highly recommend it because it's surprisingly encouraging and freeing. How? How is a study guide that is a deep dive into one of the Bible's most depressing books so encouraging and freeing? Well, as finite human beings, we always strive for what we don't already have and we constantly think about how we can improve our lives and get more "stuff." Ecclesiastes teaches us just the opposite.

Photo by Mohamed Nohassi

The opening paragraph to this article is an extended quote from Gibson's book. He's talking about how in the end, we all end up dead. Between birth and death, we try to live our best life and make the most of it. Because we are fallen creatures, rebels against our Creator, we crave what our Creator has: control and wisdom. Because we are His workmanship and not the Creator Himself, we are not made to have what He has. Our Creator gifts us with knowledge, discernment, and fragments of wisdom, so we can think for ourselves and make good decisions.

Photo by Patrick Tomasso

But we have to remember that the wisdom we have is not all-encompassing – it's just a small piece. That's why Gibson says "…part of living wisely is learning to live with the limitations of wisdom itself." Once we accept that we'll never have it all, do it all, or be it all, we're free. You and I are going to die someday. It's all going to come to an end for the billionaires, for the homeless people, and everyone in between. Why strive for something that will just end? Seems pointless, right?

Photo by Simon Matzinger

Our Creator wants us to enjoy life. That's why He's given us such sweet gifts like friendship, family vacations, and donuts. However, He didn't create us to be His equal, He created us to need Him and rely on Him. That's why we don't have control and that's why we cry out to Him for strength to persevere and to show us the way – because He already knows. So, don't worry about not knowing what tomorrow will bring. Instead, thank Him for what He has given you, and trust Him always. He is the creator of wisdom, the creator of you and me, and has full control. We need not fret.

Photo by Maxim Dužij

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When You Make A Girl An Aunt, You Change Her World In All The Best Ways

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her the happiest girl in the world.


My brother and his wife recently blessed our family with the sweetest bundle of joy on planet earth. OK, I may be a little bias but I believe it to be completely true. I have never been baby crazy, but this sweet-cheeked angel is the only exception. I am at an age where I do not want children yet, but being able to love on my nephew like he is my own is so satisfying.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her a very protective person.

From making sure the car seat is strapped in properly before every trip, to watching baby boy breathe while he sleeps, you'll never meet someone, besides mommy and daddy of course, who is more concerned with the safety of that little person than me.

When you make a girl an aunt, you give her a miniature best friend.

There is something about an aunt that is so fun. An aunt is a person you go to when you think you're in trouble or when you want something mom and dad said you couldn't have. An aunt is someone who takes you to get ice cream and play in the park to cool down after having a temper tantrum. I can't wait to be the one he runs to.

When you make a girl an aunt, she gets to skip on the difficulty of disciplining.

Being an aunt means you get to be fun. Not to say I wouldn't correct my nephew if he were behaving poorly, but for the most part, I get to giggle and play and leave the hard stuff for my brother.

When you make a girl an aunt, you give her the best listening ears.

As of right now I only listen to the sweet coos and hungry cries but I am fully prepared to listen to all the problems in his life in the future.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her the best advice giver.

By the time my nephew needs advice, hopefully, I will have all of my life lessons perfected into relatable stories.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her a number-one fan

Anything you do in life sweet boy, I will be cheering you on. I already know you are going to do great things.

When you make a girl an aunt, she learns what true love is.

The love I have for my nephew is so pure. Its the love that is just there. I don't have to choose to show love every day, I don't have to forgive, I don't have to worry if it is reciprocated, it is just there.

When you make a girl an aunt, you make her the happiest person in the world.

I cannot wait to watch my precious nephew grow into the amazing person that I know he is going to be.

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Goodbye School, Hello Real World

I'm ready for ya!


It's starting to hit me.

I've been in school, year after year, since kindergarten. Maybe even pre-school!

Now, I'm about to graduate with my bachelors in communication and I couldn't be more proud of myself. I'll say it. I often sugarcoat it or suppress it but d*mn it. I'm going to applaud myself. It was hard work. It took a lot of motivation, determination, (caffeine), and willpower to get to where I am today. I worked my ass off.

That being said, I can't help but think... What is life without due dates? What is life like without scrambling to turn in an assignment that's due at 11:59 PM? What is life like with actual sleep? Sleep? I don't know her.

Like I keep telling my boyfriend and my parents, I don't have it all figured out. At least not right now. But I will, and I'm in no rush to land my dream job right now. If anything, I want to take a year to myself. I want to travel. I want to sleep in if I d*mn well please! I want to read as many books as I want. I want to write till my fingers fall off (OK, maybe not that).

You get the jist.

I'm free. I can do and be whatever I want. And you know what? That's terrifying.

I'm lost. I've followed this structure for so long. Now what?

I don't have all the answers yet. But for now, at least right at this very moment, I'm so thankful to have been able to receive such an amazing education. And to be able to say I'm graduating with my bachelors in communication at 21 is an accomplishment in itself.

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