It's easy to get frustrated at a restaurant. You go there hungry, and eventually if your food takes a long time to come out or something has gone wrong, your mood may escalate to "hangry." Your waiter or waitress is very well aware of this and will know full well just when that switch happens. And trust me, we don't want you to be hangry as much as you don't want to be. Here's a few additional things that, as a waitress, I hope my customers know:
1. Even though eating out is a luxury, we're not "the help."
Too many times I have greeted a table and begun to ask how they are when they cut me off and demand "one water, no ice, 3 lemons." No please, no thank you, just rudeness. Or another time this lady actually snapped her fingers to get my attention while I was taking another table's order. Please don't act like this.
2. I am paid to be nice to you.
Even if you yell at me, I still have to be nice. Although I would love to yell back at you about how much of a jerk you're being, you won't get any reaction out of me other than, "I'm so sorry, what else can I do for you?" with a fake concerned look on my face. So if you're looking for a fight, this is not the place to find one.
3. Separate checks are extremely annoying.
The computer prints out about 800 receipts that no one needs and it just makes everything more confusing. But if you do insist on separate checks, expect to wait a little longer for me to get everything organized so I get it right.
4. Understand the amount of work your waitress puts in for you, and reflect that in your tip.
If you modify everything on the entree you ordered and ask for extras and watch me run around sweating trying to get you that side of honey mustard and fourth Pepsi, a tip that's less than 15% is kind of a slap in the face.
5. I probably won't call you if you leave your number on the receipt.
Unless we're blatantly batting our eyes at you and lingering by your table talking to you, us servers probably are not into you. As I mentioned, we have to be nice to you. This is not to be mistaken with flirting. It's my job.
6. Our computer probably does better math than you do.
When I discount your meal 10%, I put it in the computer and it does it for me, so when you tell me it's wrong, I can do nothing but tell you that the computer knows what 10% is, and that's 10%.
7. I will have a conversation with you, but I have things to do.
I love when my tables talk to me and treat me like a fellow human being. But realize that if I cut the conversation too short, it's because I'm at work, and unfortunately have other tables to tend to. If I could pull up a chair and continue chatting while picking at some spinach artichoke dip, I would.
8. I do not mess up your food intentionally, nor do I cook it.
Some people take it so personally when they get sweet potato fries instead of mashed sweet potatoes. As if my goal of the night was to deprive you of your sweet potato fries. If I could ring in everyone's orders perfectly, and have them come out perfectly every time, I would. It makes both our lives easier and I'd rather not have an issue on my hands that could potentially involve a manager.
9. If I forgot something, just tell me and I'll be happy to give it you right away.
I once had a table who didn't have silverware. After dropping off their food, I asked, "is there anything else I can get you guys?" They replied no. I went over after about 5-10 minutes and asked, "How'd everything come out?" They said, "Oh it's fine, thanks." When the meal was over and I had asked if they wanted their check, they said they'd like to see a manager. They complained that they had never gotten silverware and had to eat (wings and mozzarella sticks) with their hands. I won't even talk about the fact that they were eating food that does not require silverware, but they never asked me in the two times I stopped at their table or the hundreds of time I passed it for some silverware.
10. A booth is not superior to a table.
This is probably more of what your host would want you to know but I will never understand the obsession with booths. Sure, they're comfy, but you eat at a table at home, don't you? And you're fine? Also, we seat you in certain places for a reason, so the servers get an equal amount of tables and don't get sat too quickly and give someone bad service. It's all about timing and when you ask to sit somewhere other than where you were placed, there's a good chance you'll end up with worse service simply because your server is too busy.
I could go on and on and on about things I'd like my customers to know. But most of all, understand that our job is to please you and that's all we want to do. Yeah, we work for the tip, but why is that so wrong? We work and we don't even get paid minimum wage. Most people wouldn't be at their jobs if not for the money. We do our best so that you like us and hopefully come again. We want to avoid a problem as much as you do. So please, before sitting down at a restaurant next time, think about all of what you're waiter is doing and that all of it is done to make sure you have a good experience.
