After a long first semester and short breaks that didn't even feel like a break, we're back for round two. Back with new classes, schedules, stress, teachers, and textbooks that cost more than my self-worth.
It blows.
Second Semester is like the equivalent to the least favorite day of the week, Wednesday, except for it's a five-month-long hump day instead of just one day.
Nobody has the motivation to go to classes and teachers are already piling on the work which means I will be procrastinating 'til the cows come home.
So here's a list of things I'd rather do than going to second-semester classes! Enjoy.
1. Brush my teeth and then drink orange juice after
2. Fight all the "new year, new me" people at the gym for an elliptical during peak hours
3. Park in Memorial and walk to East Campus for class in under five minutes
4. Lick the floor of Theta Chi
5. Take a WOS down Port Republic Rd.
6. Rip a stinky one in front of my crush
7. Drop my new phone in the toilet after I went number 2
8. Never eat pizza again
9. Burn my tongue on hot coffee
10. Pull my hamstring at a Latin Dance Party
11. Have my backpack break and all my books fall out
12. Run laps around the stadium
13. Stub my toe
14. Drink bleach
15. Drop my phone on my face while I'm face-timing my crush
16. Listen to Nickelback on repeat
17. Do the Tide Pod challenge
18. Eat a soggy sandwich
19. Take a bath in Newman Lake
20. Shower with socks on
21. Cancel my Netflix subscription
22. Eat dog food
23. Challenge Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson to an arm wrestling contest
24. Sit in an ice bath in the snow
25. Always sit behind a tall person at the movie theatre
26. Going off of that, exclusively only watch Nicholas Cage movies
27. Re-live my middle school angst phase (it really was just a phase)
28. Never look at pictures of shirtless Adam Driver ever again
29. Get a pencil stuck up my nose for a day
30. Cry in the club
31. Not talk for a month
32. Sing the National Anthem at the Superbowl, offkey
33. Willingly give up cheese
34. Go dumpster diving for a needle
35. Hop on one foot for an entire day
36. Write an essay about the evolution of the burrito
37. Sort my socks in chronological order of when I got them
38. Eat dirt
39. Blow an entire paycheck on losing lottery tickets
40. Wear 7-inch stilettoes while going hiking
41. Only receive spam emails
42. Catch every red light ever
43. Get yelled at by Gordan Ramsey
44. Never have any privacy in the bathroom
45. Only be able to quote "Shrek" for the rest of my life
