14 Things I Wish I Learned Before I Turned 20

14 Things I Wish I Learned Before I Turned 20

It would've been cool to know all of these things a little sooner.


Being a 20-year-old can be described in one word: confusion. I've learned a lot since graduating from high school, but I definitely didn't learn everything.

1. How to keep your gas/electric bills down

I had been living in an apartment for four months before I turned 20. It took me about that long to understand that no, I cannot keep the lights on, and no, keeping the apartment cold until I'm cold and then jacking up the heat does not save me any money.

2. How to cook vegetables to make them...edible

I'm finally starting to understand the concepts of roasting and seasoning. I can cook carbs and proteins just fine, but vegetables had been a mystery to me until recently (thanks Pinterest!).

3. How to grocery shop without spending $50 each trip 


4. How to keep myself from gaining 10 pounds of pasta weight

True story: from August to December of 2018, I really did gain a ton of weight because I thought it was okay to eat noodles every night. It isn't. Now I have to learn to cook real food...how tragic.

5. How to establish and maintain a good gym routine

I always thought that any sort of exercise was good exercise, but that's not true. One trip to the gym a month does next to nothing. I finally realized that you need to keep going if you want to see any results. That seems obvious, but a lazy girl's mind will convince her to believe anything.

6. How to care less about other people's opinions

This one is still a work in progress, but the longer I spend in college existing mostly by myself, the less I care about the opinions of my peers. Social media is slowly losing its appeal to me, and yes, I will show up to class looking like I just rolled out of bed, because I did. No cares given.

7. How to practice my hobbies without feeling bad about how bad I am at them

I really enjoy painting and drawing, but I've always felt discouraged when I have this vision of a painting in my mind that doesn't quite turn out. I'm starting to get over this, because how am I going to get better if I never try?

8. How to drink enough water every day

This is a REALLY new revelation -- like, a week old from the time this is written. A good cup with a (reusable!) straw makes drinking water so much easier. And Crystal Light. That helps too.

9. How to distance myself from people who are bad for me

I have zero tolerance for people who don't add anything to my life. I've always felt mean or rude about cutting people out, but honestly, surrounding yourself with only the best people will ultimately make you feel like the best person. I wish I had learned this so much sooner.

10.  How NOT to binge watch a season of my favorite show in one sitting 

....I still have my moments of weakness, but I'm getting better. I can now watch "American Horror Story" one episode at a time, for the most part.

11.  Expensive makeup is not always better than cheap makeup

There are definitely some products I can't buy from a drugstore, but there are a ton of great quality products that cost just a few dollars. I spent so much money on expensive highlighters and mascaras and concealers when there's drugstore makeup that works just as well, if not better.

12.  How to budget responsibly 

This was a hard-learned lesson. I went absolutely broke buying Christmas presents for all of my loved ones, and it made me realize that I really need to have a separate savings account for short-term things set up. That's how you'll catch me budgeting in 2019.

13.  How to save money

I've always been the type to put half a paycheck away and leave myself no money after my bills were paid. This always ends inefficiently -- I have to steal money from my savings to afford to live. I've learned now that saving a smaller amount, like $50 a paycheck, is a much more efficient way to save when you're only working part-time.

14.  How to show my people I love them without buying them ridiculously expensive gifts for every occasion 

Quality time + experiences > expensive gifts. Christmas cleaning out my bank account definitely forced me to learn this.

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A Senior's Last Week Of High School

The bittersweet end.

Well, this is it. This is what we've worked so hard the last four years - who am I kidding - basically what seems like our whole lives for. This is the very last week we will set foot as a student in our high school's hallways. As most schools are getting ready to set their seniors free at last, it all begins to set in - the excitement, the anxiousness, and also the sentiment and nostalgia.

For seniors, the years since our first day as a freshman at the bottom of the high school totem pole have seemed endless, but as we look back on these last few weeks, we realize that this year in particular has gone by extraordinarily fast. It was just yesterday that we were sitting in our classrooms for the very first time, going to our 'last first' practice, and getting our first taste of the (very real) "senioritis". With all that's going on in our lives right now, from sports and clubs, finals, and the sought after graduation ceremony, it's hard to really sit down and think about how our lives are all about to become drastically different. For some it's moving out, and for some it's just the thought of not seeing your best friend on the way to fourth period English; either way, the feels are real. We are all in a tug of war with the emotions going on inside of us; everything is changing - we're ready, but we're not.

THE GOOD. Our lives are about to begin! There is a constant whirlwind of excitement. Senior awards, getting out of school early, parties, and of course Graduation. We are about to be thrust into a world of all new things and new people. Calling our own shots and having the freedom we have so desperately desired since the teenage years began is right around the corner. Maybe the best part is being able to use these new things surrounding you to grow and open your mind and even your heart to ideas you never could before. We get the chance to sink or swim, become our own person, and really begin to find ourselves.

Things we don't even know yet are in the works with new people we haven't even met yet. These friendships we find will be the ones to last us a lifetime. The adventures we experience will transform into the advice we tell our own children and will become the old tales we pass down to our grandkids when they come to visit on the weekends. We will probably hate the all night study sessions, the intensity of finals week, and the overpowering stress and panic of school in general, just like we did in high school... But it will all be worth it for the memories we make that will outlive the stress of that paper due in that class you absolutely hate. As we leave high school, remember what all the parents, teachers, coaches, and mentors are telling you - this are the best times of our lives!

THE BAD. The sentimental emotions are setting in. We're crying, siblings are tearing up, and parents are full-out bawling. On that first day, we never expected the school year to speed by the way it did. Suddenly everything is coming to an end. Our favorite teachers aren't going to be down the hall anymore, our best friends probably won't share a class with us, we won't be coming home to eat dinner with our families...

We all said we wanted to get out of this place, we couldn't wait, we were ready to be on our own; we all said we wouldn't be "so emotional" when the time came, but yet here we are, wishing we could play one more football game with our team or taking the time to make sure we remember the class we liked the most or the person that has made us laugh even when we were so stressed we could cry these past few years. Take the time to hug your parents these last few months. Memorize the facial expressions of your little sister or brother. Remember the sound of your dad coming home from work. These little things we take for granted every day will soon just be the things we tell our college roommate when they ask about where we're from. As much as we've wanted to get out of our house and our school, we never thought it would break our heart as much as it did. We are all beginning to realize that everything we have is about to be gone.

Growing up is scary, but it can also be fun. As we take the last few steps in the hallways of our school, take it all in. Remember, it's okay to be happy; it's okay to be totally excited. But also remember it's okay to be sad. It's okay to be sentimental. It's okay to be scared, too. It's okay to feel all these confusing emotions that we are feeling. The best thing about the bittersweet end to our high school years is that we are finally slowing down our busy lives enough to remember the happy memories.

Try not to get annoyed when your mom starts showing your baby pictures to everyone she sees, or when your dad starts getting aggravated when you talk about moving out and into your new dorm. They're coping with the same emotions we are. Walk through the halls remembering the classes you loved and the classes you hated. Think of the all great times that have happened in our high school years and the friends that have been made that will never be forgotten. We all say we hated school, but we really didn't. Everything is about to change; that's a happy thing, and a sad thing. We all just have to embrace it! We're ready, but we're not...

Cover Image Credit: Facebook

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A Letter To Me, The Girl Who Overthinks Everything

It's a weakness and a strength.


Dear Me,

In the past few years of your life, you have hated yourself for your overthinking. I want to take the time to tell you right now that your overthinking is not always a weakness, but it's a sign of your strength. And you need to see that.

I know it's a dreadful feeling. A chill runs down your back. Your mind starts racing. You need to keep moving or your mind will start screaming. You think you'll go deaf from your own thoughts. There's no moment of peace. You think you're going insane.

You analyze the texts. You think back to the conversations. Why didn't she look me in the eye? Why didn't they smile? Should I have said that? Why did I say that? You analyze every little detail to see what it means to you. You relive every mistake over in your mind until you make it right. It never ends and you hate it. But did you ever ask yourself why your brain works this way?

In the first 18 years of your life, you've been through and have done a lot. Probably more than you would like to admit. As a daughter of immigrant parents, you grew up finding your way, often on your own in the world. You needed to figure out life while teaching your parents about it at the same time. While most kids wanted to fit in, you needed to make sure you kept your Vietnamese culture. You've converted religions. You've been betrayed by good friends. You've been fat-shamed...and more. There were times where life felt like it was punching you in the gut, a million times over and you didn't know how to take it. So now, you overthink it.

Why? Well, do you realize how hard you've worked to get to where you are? You're getting awards, scholarships, and you're going to a fantastic college this fall. That's not because you sat back to let things be handed to you on a silver platter all your life. Don't get me wrong. You've been given SO MANY good things in your life, but there was also a lot of bad. Life swung at you when you least expected it. But you're here, aren't you? You overthink because you know what it is like to be fooled, and you want to know that you'll never be caught off guard again. So when life comes to get you, you're making sure you're ready to kick right back.

Another thing... Many people say you overthink because you care what other people think of you. But that's not it. It's actually quite the opposite. You overthink because you over love. All you want is to make the people in your life happy because that's what makes you happy. Life put you in their life for a reason. So, you're giving them all you have. Every little action is a chance for you to do that.

You want to do it all in your life. You overthink everything because if you do something, you're gonna do it right. Your mind needs to keep working. That's what it does even when its not supposed to.

You're strong. But you weren't always this way. Your overthinking is simply a side effect from being caught in the storm for so long. You're in a great place and you're on the way to do great things. No one can stop you now. But you still overthink it so it stays that way. This is how your brain works. It's a part of you and shows how far you've come. You're perfectly okay.

With love,

You, The Overthinker

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