In case haunted houses, gory movies, ghost stories aren't enough to get your heart racing, this list will be sure to fix that.

(You're welcome.)

-The 2016 Election: Maybe if we pretend this isn't happening, they'll both go away?

-My bank account balance: I may only have three dollars to my name, but I'll be spending that three dollars on a bag of Doritos.

-Being an adult: paying bills: the stuff of nightmares.

-The amount of money I spend eating out: What can I say? Chipotle aint cheap.

-My grades: *screams*

-The fact that I can’t remember the last time I ate a vegetable: or something I didn't have to reheat...

-How messy my room is right now: Apparently I'm not one of those people who stress cleans.

-The amount of sleep I have gotten in the past week: not counting the time I sleep in class, of course.

-My level of motivation: Things that don't exist can be pretty scary.

-My daily caffeine intake: Honestly surprised I'm still alive.

-The amount of laundry I need to do: and this is coming from someone who's wearing the same shirt they slept in, so I'll let that speak for itself.

-The clown epidemic: If anyone dresses up like a clown on Halloween, I swear.

-The national debt: don't Google what the national debt is. Just don't.

-The fact that I still don't know if I should swipe my card or insert it into the chip reader: I don't need that anxiety in my life?

-The number of times I call my mom on a given day: I think she's probably the only person who knows just how much of a mess I am.

So if you're too broke for a haunted house, but still find yourself wanting a good scare, just re-read this list. But don't blame me for the nightmares.