This summer, I got to spend a month studying in Germany and a week touring the UK and Ireland. My culture studies teacher told our class, “It’s not about the places you go, it’s about the people you meet.” He couldn’t be more correct. I’m so grateful for the friends I made abroad—my experience would definitely not have been the same (and most likely much more boring) had it not been for these acquaintances. I learned so much from these people, much more than I did in the classroom. Cliché, I know, but true.
1. PATIENCE.
Between different time zones (my friends are anywhere between six and eighteen hours ahead of me,) varying levels of decency at replying to social media messages in a timely manner, and the general insanity of life that comes with being a college/uni student, “instant” messaging is usually anything but. As a result, I have learned to expect lags in communication and come to accept them without (too much) accompanying anxiety. I have also become much more understanding of delays because since school has started, I, too, have become a slower responder than I used to be.
2. How to treasure the time you had and the time you get.
For me, one of the hardest things about making friends abroad was that I had to say goodbye to them. Since I tend to be terrible at keeping in touch, I tried to look on the bright side and be grateful for the time I got to spend with them rather than mourning the fact I couldn’t have more. The same thing applies when I hear back from them—even though it stinks not always being able to talk back right away, it makes their responses that much more valuable to me. It honestly makes my day to hear back from one of them—it’s like a surprise I wasn’t expecting, and when I open and read their message, it usually puts a smile on my face the rest of the day.
3. The value of other viewpoints.
Most of my international friends are not of the same faith as me, if they have a faith at all. Not saying this is a bad thing, but it meant I was forced out of the Midwestern bubble I’d been raised in and forced to confront worldviews that greatly differed from my own. While uncomfortable in some regards, I’m grateful for the opportunity, because it forced me to take a critical look at my own values and come up with my own statement of faith, something I most likely would not have done had I not left the country. At the same time, it also made me much more appreciative of the Christian friends and community I DID find.
4. Things you can't find in a textbook (and may or may not be suitable to say around your mom).
I will say this now: nothing in a textbook prepares you for texting in another language. It’s kind of its own swirling mess and you have no other option but to jump in with both feet, particularly if you’re not local, and ESPECIALLY if you’re not fluent. But it’s an excellent learning experience, and as long as the person you’re messaging with is also decent in English, it goes alright—most of the time.
In addition, while trying to look up (occasionally vulgar) slang in the dictionary can be useful, you can’t always find the word you’re looking for, and besides, it’s much more entertaining to be taught by a local.
5. The value of starting conversations.
Yes, it can be terrifying. Yes, not everyone you talk to is meant to stay in your life. But that doesn’t mean they can’t be part of it for awhile, and that you can’t learn something from them in the meantime. I've found that humanity, when broken down into person-sized pieces, isn't as bad as you might think, and I'm so incredibly glad I got to meet the pieces of it I did.
