As a senior elementary education student, I have had numerous opportunities to observe and volunteer in elementary classrooms. I have observed different grade levels, classroom types, and teaching styles in different schools and school districts. But throughout all of these classrooms and schools, I have seen and heard some of the same phrases uttered on countless occasions. Some are said out loud to students, some are kept quiet, and some are kept quiet only to be talked about in the workroom or over lunch with other teachers. No matter how good you are at classroom management, s**t happens...
Out loud:
1. There's no name on this!
2. What is that? Where did you get that?
3. Are you kidding me?
4. Listen closely so I don't have to repeat this a thousand times.
5. Are we listening? Really? So, what did I just say?
6. On our bottoms, please!
7. *Insert name of talkative student*
8. Student A, please leave Student B alone.
9. Where did (important lesson materials) go?
10. Someone, please remind me where we left off yesterday.
11. Okay, put your stuff away and get ready for gym. I mean art. Music? Spanish, thank you, boys and girls!
12. And then... wait, where was I?
13. *Insert cute but ineffective rhyme for getting student attention*
In their heads:
1. We just got done morning meeting, why do I already have five new emails?
2. Would you look at that, I'm going to be observed for Math/Reading/Writing "soon." Great. I love surprises.
3. No name? I bet it belongs to ( the student who never puts their name on anything).
4. What time is it?
5. Is (name of the student doing something vaguely annoying) f***ing serious right now?
6. Am I really explaining this for the fourth time?
7. Is it time for snack?
8. If I get another email notification, I'm going to scream!
9. What did I just put my hand in?
10. Did I submit my lessons for next week?
11. How much longer until lunch? I am so hungry.
12. Why do I keep losing that GODDAMN (important item)?
13. I could probably get away with putting on a movie.
To other teachers:
1. Can you watch my class, I have to use the restroom?
2. Did you read that email yet?
3. Did I tell you about the email I got earlier?
4. Can I borrow your book on (insert specific teaching topic)?
5. Copier's down again!
6. I cannot WAIT for this day to be over!
7. I got an email today that I'll be having my surprise Math/Reading/Writing observation sometime in the next month.
8. Have you gotten observed yet?
9. Did you get feedback on your observation yet?
10. I cannot WAIT for this week to be over!
11. Have you ever noticed when (student) does (slightly problematic behavior)?
12. Did you ever get that thing done? You know, the thing for whatshername?
13. I cannot WAIT until Thanksgiving/Winter/Spring/Summer break!
