Coming to college, I was headstrong and thought I had the whole world figured out. It wasn’t until I was faced with the reality of being self-dependent that things began to change. I was pushed way out of my comfort zone and was forced to adapt to life on my own. Relying on myself as the sole decision-maker was a daunting task because I was the one responsible. But it made me more vigilant about my actions. Although I’d received a plethora of advice before coming to college relating to my academics, I wish I’d known these nine things going into my freshman year.
1. College isn't high school.
This is especially true for people who come from small schools. I graduated with 60 people in my class and had known about 14 of them since kindergarten. Sure, it was a unique experience to know each classmate in my grade and have a close-knit community at school. College took me out of my comfort zone and placed me in a sea of people. I welcomed the challenge though because it gave me a chance for me to rebuild my image. Rebranding myself, by making deliberate choices about how I present myself to others, has shaped me into the person I am today.
2. It’s okay to not have it all figured out and feel lost at times.
It took me a while to adjust and learn that feeling uncertain about my future is a normal part of growing up and maturing. It’s okay to feel uncertain about your present situation too if it doesn’t feel like things are progressing in the best way possible. But it’s important to remember these feelings are fleeting and everything will work out in the end.
3. Don’t be in a rush to grow up.
Enjoy the freedom college gives you because it will always be there the next day. Take advantage of your relatively flexible schedule and engage in fun activities and build your social network. Along with this, be open to receiving advice on how to do something because you never know when someone else’s ideas supplement your own.
4. People will let you down and disappoint you.
But what’s important is how you handle this disappointment. It’s best to accept it, move on and apply what you’ve learned from the way they treated you to your own behavior towards others. When people let you down, it’s a reflection of them, so try to be different.
5. It’s okay to make mistakes.
How else would you learn? We most often notice the mistakes we make over the successful decisions we make because they force us to stop and evaluate our actions. Like with people, apply what you learn from mistakes to your future decisions to avoid repeating the mistake.
6. Learn to listen to understand.
By learning to listen to understand, you’ll improve your professional and personal relationships, by allowing you to learn more about the other person. By formulating your response based on an evaluation and understanding of what they have said, you’ll show a genuine interest in their opinion or story. This is also true of new and challenging situations and those in which your principles and values are challenged. Remember to be open to learning from other peoples’ perspectives, but remain true to who you are as an individual.
7. Not all boys are worth your time.
No matter what, prioritize your values in your decision-making. Especially when it comes to boys, don’t go out with the guy who treats you as anything less than who you are. If he doesn’t value you, you shouldn’t go out of your way to make things work out. Although it may take you a while to see it, don’t be jaded and think the first male to give you attention is worthy of your time if he doesn’t treat you with respect.
8. It’s important to take time for yourself.
Don’t run yourself into the ground. If you haven’t slept properly for a few nights, haven’t eaten properly in a few days, and are feeling the weight of balancing school work with your social life, take time to yourself. It’s important to understand when you’ve reached your limit and take time to heal and prepare yourself for the next set of challenges.
9. It’s important to love yourself.
Build and develop a relationship with yourself by learning to accept who you are and being comfortable with yourself. Loving yourself is also an important step in knowing who you are and what you want in both life and relationships.
