Post-traumatic stress disorder is a condition that can develop after someone has seen or been through something traumatic. It affects five to 10 percent of all men and seven to 14 percent of all women, not including our military.
There are a few key things that I think are important when you fall in love with someone with PTSD. I'm telling you this from experience because I suffer from it.
1. It Affects Everyone Differently
PTSD affects everyone differently. It's caused by different things that a person deals with in their life. You need to know this because it's vital. You can't just go with what you see on the internet. It's different for everyone. Anything from a car crash to seeing someone die. It all depends on what the human brain takes from that experience.
2. Treat Them As A Person
We just want someone to love us. We just want someone to understand us. We would give anything for someone to treat us as a person. We keep this to ourselves because we don't want people to see how broken we are. We are people. We want to be treated as such. We just want someone to talk to, who won't judge us. That's important.
3. Do Not Give Up On Them
Don't give up because you don't understand. Ask them questions. Ask them what happened. If they don't want to tell you, respect that. It's too much for them to tell you at this moment in time. It's too much for them to re-live right now. I promise they will tell you in time, but don't give up on them because they don't want to tell you right now.
4. The Night Terrors Are Awful
They aren't rainbows and butterflies. They suck. They wake you up in a panic. They cause you to scream because you are terrified of your dream. Night terrors are something some PTSD survivors live with. I do, and I know a few others that do. When we wake you up from an episode, I promise you, we don't mean it. Our body causes us to scream and cry because we are afraid that what's happening in our mind is really happening. It looks and feels real. Please just hold us and don't ask us until morning because we won't be able to talk about it. Sometimes it's too much.
5. Just Love Us
We are people too. We are humans and we have emotions. You can't tell just by looking at someone if they suffer from PTSD. It's not that simple. Mental illness isn't written on their face. It's not on mine. You have to trust the person who has PTSD to tell you. It's not a first date type thing - it takes awhile. A lot of trust. We want to know that you won't walk away. It's important for us. We just want to be loved.
