Being a college student is hard. I know, understatement of the year. We're constantly drowning in homework and falling behind in classes, regardless of how hard we work. You would think that given all of this stress we would look for comfort in our friends - people who are experiencing the same struggles that we are. Yet, lately, I've noticed a lot of the conversations with my friends circling back to the same topic: how we're not doing something that someone else is. For example,

"Did you know [Insert name here] got a 96 on the last exam? Why does she always do so much better than me?"

"[Insert name here] is involved in 17 clubs on campus. We're in the same major and he's going to look better than me when we apply to graduate school."

Since when did we stop looking at our friends' accomplishments as just that: accomplishments. When did their successes become a standard of comparison that allowed us to feel sorry about all the things we haven't done? Rather than only taking note of the strengths that others have and you don't, take a moment to look at all of the things that set you apart from them. Not everyone can have everything, and that's okay. That's how life is supposed to work. One person may take six classes in a semester and be involved in only a handful of clubs. Someone else may take only four classes but also work in three labs and participate in seven different clubs. These people have different interests and different qualities that they can bring to the table. And while they look different on paper, that doesn't mean that one is less successful than the other.

I'm not saying that I'm not guilty of doing exactly what I just said we shouldn't. On days when I feel like nothing is going my way, it is easy to look at how well my friends are doing and resent them for that. What I have to remind myself, and what you should tell yourself, is that comparing yourself to your friends and peers does nothing to help you. Wishing you did as well as someone else on an exam won't increase your score on the next one. Being envious of your best friend's involvement with clubs on campus won't make you president of the club you're in. So rather than spending time comparing yourself to others, use that time to work with what you have. If you're not happy with what you're doing, change it. Don't look at your friends and wish that you could do what they're doing, because you can. But to do that you don't have to join all the same clubs or take all the same classes, because those are your friend's strengths not yours. Do what makes you happy, and I promise you'll be just as successful as the other people you're surrounded by.

Let's do each other a favor and stop making college harder than it already is. Be happy for your friends when they do well on an exam or get elected to a new position. Don't let the first thought that comes to your mind be, "I wish that were me." They're your friends, and they're the reason you're going to make it out of this place in one piece. There are enough people out to bring you down without you doing it to yourself. So treat your friends like your friends, not your competition.