Over the last year, I began to notice that not every lesson I had been taught over the years was totally black and white. Yes, obviously there are no “ifs, ands or buts” when it comes to things like running with scissors, stealing or lying. But lately, I find myself perceiving other lessons with such ambiguity. I have started questioning the validity of everything I had been taught. Not because I am a rebellious teenager dabbling in defiance, but because I have started to see depths to life that I had never really experienced before. It’s like each day I awake and am struck with some revelation that I had overlooked for so long. Until now.
Growing up, I was taught to give my all in everything that I do. I was told that every commitment should be honored, every race should be finished and nothing should be left incomplete. Perseverance has been engraved into my mind and my heart as I have set goals, giving everything I have to see even the slightest glimpse of success. Every time I fall, I am told to get the hell back up and try again. Keep working. Keep dreaming. Keep going. Hard work and determination are lessons taught to me that I have never once doubted or questioned, for I know that the path that leads to my dreams is not one that is going to be easily traveled. Giving up has never been an option, for giving up connotes weakness. At least, that is what I had always believed.
What I had failed to realize is that the greatest strength lies in those who are able to give up, to let go and to seek out something far more extraordinary than what they are leaving behind. I realized that sometimes in life, we have to give up. Not because we are incapable or lack the desire to hold on, but because holding on would keep us from growing. Sometimes we have to give up on each other, and that is one of the hardest things we will ever do. It takes bravery, courage and fortitude for someone with a broken heart and a lost mind to wholly let go of someone so familiar, leaving behind every memory and every promise. When we give up on someone, we are stripped of our hope and must proceed to walk nakedly into a vast world that seems to expose and magnify every vulnerability. How could that ever be portrayed as weak?
So sometimes it is OK to give up, to let go. It is OK to stop trying. It is OK to walk away. It is OK to stop sending text after text, apologizing for doing absolutely nothing but caring for another person. We do not always need to hold on and continue fighting, because we often end up finding ourselves amidst a battle that, no matter the amount of effort we put in, will be lost. Maybe we need to perceive it not as giving up, but as starting over. Because that is what life is all about right? Broken and shattered endings followed by beautiful new beginnings. I think we mustn't be blinded by the negative misconceptions that giving up entails, for if we carried all of life's heavy burdens around with us, there would be no room for growth, no room for laughter, no room for forgiveness. Then where would we be?
