I’ve often seen this statement printed on greeting cards or inspirational posters: “Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.” There are many truths to this. So many people have come into my life and have been there for a season—school, work, one special summer. Other times, there have been people that I have grown close to that have quickly left my life for one reason or another. All of these people that I have come to know have had some kind of impact on my life, big or small. There is one special person, however, who I have never met, but who has made a very big impact on my life. That person is my grandmother.
Around my neck, I wear the only personal affect of hers that was given to me. It is a simple gold locket with her faded initials printed on it: DWB. Dorothy Wright Benton was my dad’s mother. The things I know of her are few, such as her love for language and words, her strong prayer life, her making tuna casserole every Wednesday night, and her close relationship with her youngest son—my dad.
My dad hasn’t told me much about my grandmother, so I’ve imagined many things about her. I imagine that she was emotionally strong, able to care for her sisters, one of whom suffered from anxiety. I imagine that she was a protective mother, even from her husband, who at times could be gruff. I imagine her cooking in the kitchen and asking my dad to come help her. I imagine her fervent prayers touching people’s lives in ways she never knew. And I imagine meeting her in heaven and saying, “Hi Grandmom, I’ve never met you, but I’ve been looking forward to this moment my whole life.”
Sometimes I feel cheated out of knowing this important woman. I’m sure that my dad feels the same way. Unfortunately, my grandmother died on an operating table when my dad was only seventeen years old. My dad’s best friend was taken away from him that day. If she were here, she could tell me so many stories about him as a child, or stories of my aunts and uncle. We could talk about how much we love words. We could cook together in the kitchen, and complain about how much we both dislike it. I could have asked her about her growing up years, why she fell in love with Grandpop, her favorite hobbies. Instead, I can only picture these moments in my head.
Some may wonder how someone I’ve never met has made an impact on my life. Sometimes I wonder, too. But, like a pebble thrown in a pond causes a ripple effect, so does one generation affect another. Those seventeen years my dad had with his mother have impacted his life in a very big way. He wouldn’t be the person he is today without her influence. I wouldn’t be the person I am today without my dad’s influence: therefore, the ripple affect. My grandmother’s life has touched mine, regardless of the fact we’ve never met face to face.
Because of my grandmother, I have a love of words and writing them and understanding how they can create stories. I am fascinated by languages, and am curious to learn new ones. Like her, language comes naturally to me. I, too, do not enjoy cooking, but I love to bake. I, too, have a burden to pray for those in need. To be like my grandmother is what I strive toward.
It’s amazing how the life of someone you have never met can still make a deep impact on your own life. In the case of my grandmother, she was never physically in my life. Yet, her footprints are imprinted on my heart. The ripples of her legacy have affected my life for the better.
