What Was Vs. What Is

What Was Vs. What Is

Don't ever let anyone walk on you.

Since my freshman year of college is coming to an end, I figured I should write about certain circumstances that have literally changed my life and changed my perceptions.

5. I've found my lifelong friends.

Throughout this entire experience I have come to terms with who is actually is important in my life. You might even meet your very best friend out of a truly messed up friendship that was pure toxicity that needed to be disposed of.

4. It's better to not try to be friends with negative influences.

I've made an unfortunate conclusion that there are people who aren't emotionally mature enough to be in a college setting. It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that I just can't please everyone. No matter how much of a good person you'd like to believe yourself to be, it's not your fault, YOU ARE NOT TRASH, and you're not a dog who has to obey every command to someone who isn't a stable person. Sometimes, you're own big heart can pull the wool over your eyes until someone has to show you the truth.

3. It's the personality that counts.

Coming from such a small, predominately white town, it was such a relief to be able to befriend people of other races and even sexual orientations. I am not judgmental, and I absolutely adore the groups of people who I get to spend every day with. College has given me the opportunity to meet people who I would never have met otherwise. These people have become my second family when I am away from my own.

2. Don't let people be demeaning towards you.

Being walked on is not fun, so stop letting jerks and derelicts judge you because you're not a typical "promiscuous" college girl. Stop letting people become angry with you because you might be doing better than they are. They should be happy for you, not upset over your accomplishments. People should build each other up, not put each other down. Jealousy should never exist in a friendship. Ultimately, petty is as petty does. It can be quite embarrassing to have to explain to not only your family members who are alumni, but incoming students as well that the majority of the student body truly doesn't act inappropriately.

1. Make yourself clear.

As someone who hardly ever stands up for myself, I've had to come to terms with the fact that it's okay to actually do so. Whether it be due to my best friend standing up for me, or my own actions, don't EVER let anyone emotionally and verbally abuse you. Standing up for yourself is not a bad thing at all! People can be vindictive and malicious, but you've got to not let them get to you. You are the better person whether you realize it or not.

If anything, I hope the lesson learned here is that nobody needs to be taking any person's bad attitude to heart. One bad seed trying to throw shade doesn't have to get under your skin. Every time you see that person, just think of them as a total stranger and all will be well.

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The Truth About Young Marriage

Different doesn't mean wrong.

When I was a kid, I had an exact picture in my mind of what my life was going to look like. I was definitely not the kind of girl who would get married young, before the age of 25, at least.

And let me tell you, I was just as judgmental as that sentence sounds.

I could not wrap my head around people making life-long commitments before they even had an established life. It’s not my fault that I thought this way, because the majority opinion about young marriage in today’s society is not a supportive one. Over the years, it has become the norm to put off marriage until you have an education and an established career. Basically, this means you put off marriage until you learn how to be an adult, instead of using marriage as a foundation to launch into adulthood.

When young couples get married, people will assume that you are having a baby, and they will say that you’re throwing your life away — it’s inevitable.

It’s safe to say that my perspective changed once I signed my marriage certificate at the age of 18. Although marriage is not always easy and getting married at such a young age definitely sets you up for some extra challenges, there is something to be said about entering into marriage and adulthood at the same time.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

Getting married young does not mean giving up your dreams. It means having someone dream your dreams with you. When you get lost along the way, and your dreams and goals seem out of reach, it’s having someone there to point you in the right direction and show you the way back. Despite what people are going to tell you, it definitely doesn’t mean that you are going to miss out on all the experiences life has to offer. It simply means that you get to share all of these great adventures with the person you love most in the world.

And trust me, there is nothing better than that. It doesn’t mean that you are already grown up, it means that you have someone to grow with.

You have someone to stick with you through anything from college classes and changing bodies to negative bank account balances.

You have someone to sit on your used furniture with and talk about what you want to do and who you want to be someday.

Then, when someday comes, you get to look back on all of that and realize what a blessing it is to watch someone grow. Even after just one year of marriage, I look back and I am incredibly proud of my husband. I’m proud of the person he has become, and I’m proud of what we have accomplished together. I can’t wait to see what the rest of our lives have in store for us.

“You can drive at 16, go to war at 18, drink at 21, and retire at 65. So who can say what age you have to be to find your one true love?" — One Tree Hill
Cover Image Credit: Sara Donnelli Photography

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Summer And Jobs

Working summers doesn't have to be tedious.


Like many other college students, I was ready for summer but was kinda bummed that I had to work. Its not that I didn't like where I was working, I actually was really lucky to be working in a hospital environment but I just hated being alone all summer from 9-5. I've had this job for a few years now and a few other paid interns came and went but I never really connected with any of them. This year is different though.

I got really lucky to have another intern work with me that was very similar to me. The tasks we got were always simple but they were made to be more fun because I got to do them while talking with someone else. Now I actually enjoy and look forward to going to work.

The key to finding a good job is finding one that you enjoy doing and one that will help you gain knowledge that will help you out with future career plans. Working with friends also make tasks enjoyable! I would be careful with working with your friend however because if your job needs you to be serious and focused, being around your best friends may distract you from that.

Another thing that definitely makes summer jobs more enjoyable are taking breaks! It is your summer vacation after all! I'm not saying don't take a day off just to sit around, but if you make plans with family and friends, take a Friday off and enjoy the warm weather and good company! Employers understand that us college students and on break and have lives, they are usually very lenient with days off!

If you have to do a summer job to make money to live off of or pay for college, the best thing to do is look at the big picture. If you don't enjoy your job but can't afford to quit, remember that the money if going to help you out a lot. Also, this job is probably only for the summer right? So it's not permanent my friend! Get through these annoying few weeks and you will be back at college, taking steps for a bigger and brighter future.

Summer jobs are tough, I know, but make the most of it! And don't forget to enjoy it whenever you can!!!


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