Snapchat may be the most genius social media to date. It started with nudes ugly pictures to our friends and turned into the most visual form of social media. It’s a way to tell the world how interesting your life is 24/7 even if it’s not even close. It might be the only social media site your family has yet to invade you on. If you’re a normal Snapchat user, you’ll agree you’re addicted. Snapchat can’t get you in trouble because everything is only temporary (damn you, screenshotters). There are the best kind of Snappers: you can’t wait to watch the pics they post. And then there are the worst kinds of Snappers: they’re a whole new level of the worst.
The Basic B*tch
These people are the ones who you can guess what their story is going to be before you even watch it. They snapchat things like their walk to class on a nice day with the temperature, their coffee in an artsy mug and selfies with the caption of the irrelevant activity they’re about to go do.
The Double Dipper
This is the person who sends you a personal snap and makes you feel like you two are real friends. Then immediately turns annoying when you see the exact same snap on their story.
The Smashed-chatter
Go out without documenting every shot and relatively good song you heard at the bar on your story? Unheard of for these people. They must tell you they had fun and went out last night. Because how else would everyone know they had a good time? You may wonder if they're okay by the time you get to the end of their story.
The Black Screen Snapchatter
Either this person doesn’t want you to see that they didn’t get ready today, or they just don’t have anything interesting to show but they have something to tell you on their story. They put their phone on the table, their lap or maybe just up against their hand? Whatever they do, the screen is black with only words. Maybe they are mistaking Snapchat for Twitter or texting?
The Selfie Queen or King
You could be quizzed on what this person looks like every day. They’ve taken Instagram to a whole new, obnoxious level. It’s worse if they use the Snapchat filters and caption IN their Instagram. Selfie videos are a whole new meaning of “the worst”.
The Singing Snapper
This is the person singing while driving. Not only is this hazardous to the safety of everyone on the road while you watch to make sure your singing face looks as attractive as you think it is, but it’s uncomfortable to watch. How many times have you watched all 10 seconds of these snaps? And how uncomfortable does it make you to think about someone actually intently watching all 10 seconds of you singing?
The Netflix Sharer
If I wanted to watch Netflix, I wouldn’t be watching your Snapchat Story. And maybe I haven’t gotten to that episode in The Office yet, and maybe I didn’t know that Jim and Pam had gotten to that stage in their relationship yet. So now the entire season is ruined because you needed to snap “I love this part” with three heart eye emojis. Thank you for that. Thank you.
The Debby Downer
Social media should only be used when someone is happy. Everyone should be in agreement that thou shall not use social media when sad or angry. It doesn’t make you feel better to document your sad or a blank screen with “so annoyed”. Take it out on your significant other like the rest of us.
The Sub-Snapper
This is a step below the emotional snapper. They’re trying to get the message across that they want to Netflix and chill with a “Netflix-ing alone” shot or a meal with a “dinner for one” caption. Super subtle. Except not. Keep the passive agresive hints to Twitter, please.
The Snap-Catter
This person is not only obsessed with their pet, but they want everyone else to be, too. They think every move their pet makes needs to be shared with the world. Wow, it’s really so cute how they sleep for the eighth time this week, really.
Team Snapchat
"Yes! I got a snap from Team Snapchat!" said no one ever.
The Frenemy
This is the “friend” who snaps ugly pictures of their friends or embarrassing things their friends are doing. The reason we’re friends is because you don’t judge me or show the world what I look like when I’m eating my burrito at 3 a.m. on a Thursday night, duh.
The Screenshotters
You might not even have this friend on Snapchat. You probably deleted and blocked them because they are the actual worst. There’s a trust that exists between you and your Snapchat friends. And that is that you will not screenshot snaps. It defeats the whole purpose, really. This purpose disobeys this rule in a way that it is sick and wrong to blackmail you at a later time. No one should have this friend on Snapchat.
The MIA Story Snappers
If you never put anything on your story, do you even do anything? And if you never put anything on your story... we all know what you actually use it for…
