Both BuzzFeed and MTV have recently begun to air their own versions of a series titled Ladylike. While both programs focus on female tendencies or gender roles, MTV’s version is about breaking free from gender stereotypes, and BuzzFeed’s Ladylike dives into the idea of “untrendy” women experimenting with pop culture’s latest trends.
I agree with BuzzFeed’s overall message that all women should be treated as women whether they are wearing a dress and heels, or jeans and sneakers. The only issue with this message is that it validates the misconception that being “ladylike” is actually a bad thing, because the video makes out the “unladylike” girl (shown above) to be free-spirited and humorous, which might imply that ladylike women are not this way. This suggestion is biased and is actually an indirect stereotyping of both “ladylike” and “unladylike” women.
BuzzFeed’s Ladylike series is giving men and women the idea that “ladylike” women, who (by BuzzFeed’s standards) may just be women who care about their appearance and follow trends, are “high-maintenance” and are therefore less desirable than “unladylike” women. The show, regardless of whether its creators want to include the message “not being a lady doesn’t mean you’re not a woman” in one of their videos, still gives women the idea that ladylike women are more feminine than unladylike women. Some commenters are feeling like they need to go by BuzzFeed’s standards of what is and what isn’t ladylike.
I understand that BuzzFeed’s videos primarily serve to entertain, but BuzzFeed has failed to see that putting young women in these experimental situations or “challenges” (such as wearing long-wear lipstick or drugstore makeup or trying out bath bombs) is basically labeling women who do these things as “ladylike.” Then, at the end of almost every episode, the girls come to terms with the idea that it was “fun, but not for me,” or “it was hard so I wouldn’t do that again or every day,” which leads too many girls feeling stereotyped for what they choose to wear or do. One girl commented, “These experiments are just me every day” under their video about wearing joggers.
As for MTV’s Ladylike, I agree with its objective to diminish the high standards placed upon women to obey gender roles. Though, since their skits are designed to be comedic, the show does not much help women in terms of oppression. Rather, men are simply seeing these women make jokes out of everyday struggles or stereotypes in a woman’s life. For example, the female hosts perform a social experiment where they catcall men to show them how degrading and uncomfortable it is for women. Unfortunately, they end up pretty much just giving guys an ego boost and the ladies make fools out of themselves, but I can appreciate the message they were trying to send.
However, the ladies perform another hidden camera prank where a woman speaks sexually to her significant other on the phone very loudly inside a restaurant to see how customers would react. When would a woman ever do this (besides for a prank) and how often do you even see or hear about women doing this? This isn’t necessarily a common gender role we have been stereotyped by and need to break free from, for I don’t believe that men place a stereotype upon women that we all act like sex workers or sexual deviants that would do this. I also don’t believe it’s very common for men to do this either. The hosts perform a few other similar skits like this one, where it is more about the comedic factor than about gaining equality for women. While I understand that this show needs to be entertaining for ratings, I don’t think I would recommend this show to any women who fight for equality, as they would probably think this show is just making a joke out of the whole thing.
In addition, the show can sometimes be biased when it comes to the opposite sex. It actually reestablishes stereotypes for men. For example, in one of their hidden camera experiments called “Date Stacking,” which is from the very first episode (pictured above). The host, Nicole Byer, explains that men date multiple women at once, and therefore need to see what it feels like when a woman does the same. While I agree that men shame women for having too many lovers in their lifetime and yet they get high-fives from their friends when they do it, the truth is that there are many women today who date multiple men at one time, just as men do. We simply cannot continue to place a stereotype among men that they are all cheaters, and women are innocent victims who never cheat. Thus, while I see what MTV and BuzzFeed are trying to do, their shows unfortunately seem to actually reinforce stereotypes among young men and women.
MTV’s Ladylike airs on Thursdays, 11 p.m. ET.
BuzzFeed releases new episodes of Ladylike every Wednesday and Sunday on their Youtube channel.
