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The Thoughts of a Highly Sarcastic and Irritable Person

But mostly sarcastic. With a side of sass.

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The Thoughts of a Highly Sarcastic and Irritable Person

We all have those days where anything anyone does or says bothers us. That’s OK. I am a prime example of that person on a daily basis. If you’re an easily irritable person, you get tired of other people very quickly. Sarcasm and sass are second nature to you. Here are some thoughts that go through my head on a regular basis.

1. When someone brags to you about their relationship, grades, or just anything really:


Deep, deep down I am happy for them. Kind of.

2. This thought runs through your head at least 10 times a day:


Really anything anyone does can trigger this thought. Oops. I should probably work on that.

3. When you see a couple that is all over each other in public:


You guys are really cute but I just made awkward eye contact.

4. When you decide to leave your room and face the world:


Maybe I can just turn around and pretend like I never left.

5. When your professor is lecturing for what seems like hours:


I do pay attention…sometimes.

6. When someone ruins an episode of your favorite show that you were planning on watching later that day:


I also think this when someone reminds me about that assignment that I haven’t started yet that’s due in 2 hours.

7. When you’re at a concert or place with a lot of people and everyone keeps bumping into you:


I’m slightly claustrophobic and I don’t like human interaction.

8. When you actually decide to go out and socialize:


This is a rare occurrence.

9. When people judge you for your major or criticize a change in your appearance:


Don’t tell me how to live my life.

10. When your ex has a new significant other and tries to rub it in your face:


That is such a mature move. This is why we didn't work out.

11. When you know your attitude is too much for someone to be in a relationship with you:


I think I’m quite a catch. If you like highly annoyed, sarcastic people.

12. When someone tells you a really bad joke:


It’s not you, it’s me. Just kidding, it was you. You’re not funny.

13. When someone tries to tell you to "lighten up" and to "stop being bothered by everything:"


What's the fun in that?

14. When someone brings up a really embarrassing moment of yours:


I really don't want to think about it anymore. This is why I don't go out in public.

15. When someone comes to you in need of relationship advice:


That’s really all I have to offer.

Looking back at this list, I realize I should probably work on my inner monologue. And outer. But I promise I’m actually a nice person. Just don’t annoy me and we’re solid. I’m just kidding. Kind of.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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