Some people say, “The friends you make in high school will be your friends for life.” Other people say, “The friends you make in college will be your friends for life.” Which do you believe? Do you believe either? Or do you believe neither?
When we graduate from high school and prepare to embark on the craziest, weirdest four years of our life (otherwise known as college), many of us make plans to visit our high school friends at their respective colleges, but say “see ya later” in the meantime and feel the rush of excitement as we look forward to college parties, football games, and all the new friends we expect to make. It’s college, this is where we will meet our best friends for life, right? It’s college, this is where we will meet our future bridesmaids, right? For some of us, yes. For others, it was a nice try but you might just have to hire a bridesmaid at the rate you’re going. (If you think I’m joking, there is actually a company that specializes in hiring bridesmaids: Bridesmaidforhire.com.)
Freshmen Year: Finally, your high school reputation is behind you and this is your chance to start over; you’re in a new environment with thousands of people you have never met. These people missed the awkward years and all of the embarrassing things you did/said in high school; this is your chance to decide who you want to be and show your new peers who you are. This is the year that you are as hopeful as ever. This is the year that you are going to meet your best friends for life.
Sophomore Year: Last year was incredible. You met so many great people on your floor, in the clubs you joined, in your sorority, etc. You didn’t meet your best friends for life, but you met a lot of potential best friends, so you are still as hopeful as ever. You know these people; you made lifelong memories with these people, some of them too crazy that you “forgot” to tell your parents. The people you met last year, some of them have to be your best friends for life, right? At least one of those girls is going to be your bridesmaid, right?
Junior Year: Another year has passed and you’re already halfway through college. As a graduating high school senior, you had expectations that you’d have already met your best friends for life at this point. As a college junior, you are disappointed to realize that you haven’t met a single person that you view as a lifelong friend. As a college junior, you are disappointed to realize that you might actually have to hire a bridesmaid or two because you don’t have a group of friends beside you waiting for the green light. As a college junior, you are as no longer as hopeful as ever, you are as confused as ever because things aren’t going as expected. You have friends, you have plenty of people you associate with, but you don’t have any best friends; most of your friendships are surface level and you don’t have anyone you can truly rely on. As you look around, it seems that everyone around you has a solid group of friends, except you. As you’re in the midst of the halfway point in your college years, you frequently ask yourself, “What am I doing wrong?” “What can I change about myself that will give me that solid group of friends I’ve always wanted, that solid group of friends that everyone else has?”
Senior Year: You’re graduating this year. By now, it seems that everyone around you has a solid group of friends that will travel with them into the next phase of their life: Adulthood. By now, it seems that all of the future bridesmaids are taken. Bridesmaidforhire.com, where you at? Ya girl is going to need some assistance because she has not succeeded in finding her lifelong best friends.
To all the people who found their lifelong best friends in either high school or college (or both if you’re lucky), what’s your secret? I'd really like to know because the struggle is SO real. Either I'm weird as hell, awkward as hell, annoying as hell, or just unlucky.
To all the people who found their lifelong best friends, I’m happy for you. Believe me, I don’t have anything against you; for the most part, I envy you because loneliness inhabits my life frequently and it’s incredibly difficult and annoying not having a go-to person to grab food with or hit up a frat party with.
To all the “surface-level” friendships I mentioned above, I hope you don’t take offense to this or think, “Oh, I thought we were friends but I guess not.” We are friends and I am beyond thankful for that because college would be absolutely miserable without you. I may feel excluded from time to time as you hang out with your best friends, but I have nothing against you and I’m so happy that you’re happy; you deserve happiness.
Now please, don't give me pity. College may be lonely as hell for the people who don't have a solid group of friends by their side, but if anything, it makes us stronger because we don't really have anyone to rely on in times of need; a lot of times we have to rely on ourselves to be our own best friend; a lot of times we have to be our own lunch date because we're not sure who to ask. If anything, we'll leave college stronger than ever because we learned how to rely on ourselves for happiness. But hey, I'd give anything to be that girl surrounded by her best friends.
Who knows, maybe I'll find those lifelong friends in the next phase of my life. If not, at least I tried and if all else fails, I'll always have bridesmaidforhire.com to fall back on -- but hey, I'm only a sophomore so I haven't lost complete hope yet. Only time will tell.
