Being "quiet" has a negative connotation and I think it's time for me to clear the air on this. Why me? Because I am someone people call "quiet" and it's always done in a tone of pity, sympathy or judgement. Why now? Because I'm tired of people feeling the need to point out that I'm quiet, like it's something I need to change. I would never point out to someone that they're loud, so why point out when someone is quiet?
PSA: Being quiet is not a bad thing. It's simply the personality trait opposite to loud. Neither is better, neither is worse. Being quiet is a personality trait that seems to be frowned upon, which only makes us quiet people feel as though we are wrong for who we are.
I don't constantly feel the need to talk about every single thing I think to every single person I see. To my mom? Yes. To my best friend? Yes. To people outside my friends and family? No. I can be loud and talk until I'm blue in the face with certain people who are very close to me, but if we're not close, that's not going to happen. My body subconsciously knows when I'm comfortable in a situation or with certain people, which then determines how much I contribute to the conversation with those around me, if at all.
I don't like being the center of attention. If I'm in a group setting, I'll be the wallflower, patiently listening to conversations, laughing when something is funny, reacting to people around me, and maybe throwing in my own comment or two. I don't need all eyes on me with everyone listening to me.
Being quiet comes with many positive traits: I'm observant, I'm a good listener, and I have a great memory. I watch things happen around me and how people interact with each other. I listen to everything people say when they speak to me. I remember what goes on and what is said because I am sitting back, letting life happen while I take it all in. And, it adds a bit of mystery. We keep people guessing. They know that we're thinking, but not what we're thinking. There's so much power in that.
I can be loud and hog the conversation when I want, but I can also sit back and let people do the talking. I have things to say, just not to everyone within earshot. I have a lot of thoughts going through my head, but I would rather not voice them to people I'm not particularly comfortable with or people I have no interest talking to.
Quiet people are not mutes, they are not boring, dumb, shy, mean, or passive. None of these words are synonymous with "quiet" and we need to stop associating them with each other. Being quiet is not a flaw. It's a personality trait--and not a negative one.
