We’ve all had a countdown until break and now it is finally here. Most of all our friends just pack up their cars and say, “au revoir.” They’ll cut class to get an early start on the drive, but for us out-of-staters, well, our going home preparations look a little different.
1. The night before break is spent in solitude.
All your friends have left you and are Instagramming their “home at last pictures” while you are in your dorm room just sitting there, utterly alone.
2. Then after the pity party and ordering yourself a box of pizza, you start packing.
Because unlike your lucky counterparts, you can’t just throw everything in a car, it must fit in a suitcase. And heck if you are going to check a bag.
3. Then you realize you are going to have to check a bag.
Because you over-packed (again) and don’t want to take stuff out, so now you have to do the complicated task of weighing your bag. On the scale, off the scale. On the scale with the bag. Subtract the difference. But then decide you gained 10 pounds in five minutes, and your suitcase definitely only weighs 42 pounds. Then, at the airport you, are sweating bullets, praying they won’t catch your overweight bag.
4. Now you get your ride to the airport.
It’s not a pleasant ride. There’s too much stuff.
5. You get there and are all ready to check your bag.
But they tell you they can’t check you in because you are five hours early instead of four. Curse you, paranoid self, for being so early!
6. You finally check in after an hour of people watching.
7. Only to realize there is a crazy long line to get through security.
8. Then you are walking to your gate -- trying to out-walk fellow fliers.
9. Once you are at your gate there is nothing to do but Netflix and sleep.
10. You avoid eye contact with your fellow fliers.
11. You wake up disoriented and hoping you didn’t miss your flight.
Then you realize you are hungry, but airport food just isn’t in your college budget. Back to sleep to avoid hunger!
12. Finally, they tell you to board your plane.
But standing in the line to board makes it feel like you are literally going nowhere.
13. You get on the plane only to have people try to fit overhead bags that will obviously need to be checked.
Do you have any perception of depth?
14. You end up squished between two people.
Why didn’t I check in to my flight earlier?
15. Then they tap you on the shoulder part way through the flight.
They ask if they can use the armrests, or crawl over you to go to the bathroom, or for you to turn your music down. Um, no.
16. Finally, the magical voice of the flight attendant says you are “preparing your final descent.”
17. When you are waiting for people to get off the plane.
Is it that hard to grab your bag from the overhead bins?
18. Then you get off the plane after many a squished hour.
19. And you have to get your bag from the fast moving carousel.
How come it gets faster whenever I reach in to grab my suitcase?
