I drink a lot of Starbucks. Part of that is because I work there, and thus spend a solid amount of my time there. But it is also partly due to the caffeine addiction that I have picked up during my almost two years of employment. In my time as a barista, I have observed many different types of customers, with varying levels of commitment to the brand. From a behind-the-counter point of view, a Starbucks addiction happens gradually, in stages that can easily be pinpointed and described by the type of customer who resides within the stages. So, without further ado, the stages of a Starbucks addiction:
1. Casual Customer
You really only visit your local Starbucks when you feel like treating yourself, when you’re afraid that you’ll die from exhaustion, or when you get a gift card; which means that you’re hardly ever there. The sizes make no sense to you, and you find that you’re sometimes frustrated when trying to use the “Starbucks Lingo,” but you are a big fan of the dark roast or the frappuccinos. The high prices and cult like following behind the brand usually deter you from going through the drive thru, because you’d rather opt for something else.
2. Frequent Flyer
You like Starbucks! You have a favorite drink and pastry/breakfast sandwich that keeps you coming back. You’re typically there once a month, just when you're feeling in the mood for a Strawberry Acai Refresher and a cake pop. When they tell you that they’re out of your regular drink, you don’t really know what to do because you usually only get that one thing. However, you can feel your way around the menu enough to be okay.
3. Tried and True Starbucks-er
You are quite the Starbucks fan. You visit every other week or so, so that you can get your fix. You alternate the drink that you order every few visits, because you have more than one favorite. You don’t know a lot about coffee or about the company, but you enjoy the products and the atmosphere.
4. Gold Card Member
Gold Card Member is a thin line between Stages three and five. You’re there probably once a week, just on the days that you really need it before or after work. You use your phone to pay because you like how easy it is, and you probably buy the bagged coffee beans while you’re there. You carry the gold card proudly in your wallet, and you feel like you’re in a special club when you get free refills on your coffee and tea. But this power can be detrimental, because soon you become a...
5. Regular
You’re at Starbucks at least a few times a week. The baristas know how you like your latte and which bagel you want, and they know you’re going to pay with your gold card so that you can get the stars. Starbucks is probably a place that feels like home to you, and you think of the Baristas as your friends. You might even be friends with some of them on Facebook!
6. Full Blown Addict
You’re at Starbucks daily, if not multiple times a day. You have perfected your drink so that it has multiple modifiers and is made just the way you like it. The baristas at the store you frequent know your drink order, occupation, and children’s/siblings’ names. Your phone or laptop automatically connects to the Starbucks wifi, because you use it so often. You’re always hoping that someone else will suggest going to Starbucks, because you’re the one who suggested it the last 54 times and you want to hide your addiction.
7. BONUS LEVEL: Employed
You literally spend upwards of 20 hours a week at Starbucks, and can consume approximately twice your bodyweight in espresso shots. Even when you’re not at work, you can usually be found at Starbucks keeping the caffeine content of your blood high. You sometimes think about quitting, but the free drinks and sizable discount make it difficult to leave. Your drink is so expensive and complicated that it would be physically painful to have to pay full price for it.
