It is no secret that women are hyper-sexualized in media. Whether it is “eye candy” in a movie, breasts in a magazine, or sex roles in novels, women are being portrayed for their sex appeal more than anything else. And let me say this as well. There are no problems with breasts being displayed. I am all for freeing the nip. However, sexualizing women’s bodies is what lead to displays of breasts being a problem. It lead to mothers being shamed for breastfeeding in public. It lead to the idea that it’s okay for our government to regulate women’s bodies.

I am not a woman, I am not even a man. I can only echo the voices of my fellow feminists, the amazing women in my life. However, I cannot use my voice to delegitimize the concerns, the opinions, and the cries of the feminist movement. It is also no secret that lesbians are fetishized and sexualized by men as well. For example there are lesbian porn sites dedicated to men. Whereas the gay community is not nearly as often sexualized by women.

People fail to realize the messages these problems send out. Our culture is telling women that their only value comes from their appearance. That women aren’t sexy if they don’t meet the narrowly defined window our culture calls beauty. That women are a thing for others sexual use other rather than being seen as a person with decision making capabilities. That it is okay for adults to impose sexual roles onto young girls (false lashes, hair extensions, spray tans, fake teeth, and makeup, all tools used in the popular TLC show “Toddlers and Tiaras”).

What about men’s dreaded store aisle "feminine products.” Why are we teaching women to be ashamed? To hide menstruation. Why are we telling women their bodies are gross? Why are we placing someone's value in their genitals? Why is virginity synonymous with purity? Why am I unclean, why are women unclean if we have had sex or multiple sexual partners? Masculinity is becoming increasingly toxic. I was in Walmart recently and saw moist towelettes called “Dude Wipes.” I cannot help but laugh at how ridiculous that is. You have to feel manly about wiping your ass? We impose gender roles onto our products. Men's clothing, women's clothing, shoes, razors, deodorants, pens and pencils, toys, and so much more. (Don’t even get me started on bathrooms.) All of that fails to even acknowledge the non-binary. Where is the gender fluid clothing? Where is the two-spirit clothing? What we refuse to realize is that gender neutrality is already there. It has been covered up by ridiculous titles: “men’s” and “women’s” was added to “clothes,” was added to “shoes,” was added to "products.”