I wasn't born with a verbal filter, so I always have to stop myself from saying things that may be hurtful to another person or myself. I find it hard to keep my thoughts from spewing out of my mouth at all times of the day. Now, you may be thinking that by stopping myself from saying whatever I want, whenever I want, is in fact a filter, but it's not. That is a learned response to the failing relationships I've racked up in my few years of life. Sometimes, it's just easier to keep quiet and leave situations to run their course. Other times, you need to remember that having an opinion is okay but you need to learn how to form responsible, reasonable and respectable thoughts in order for your opinion to really matter.

I remember when I was in high school, there was a group of girls who made it their mission to make me miserable. Everyday I'd walk the long way through the halls to avoid their class schedules. I could've told them what was going through my head as they were slinging hurtful, and frankly fictitious, comments at me. I could've turned to the blonde "princess" and told her that her boyfriend at the time was making out with her best friend in the hallway the day before. Or that her mom was on the phone outside of school last week, while waiting for her to get out, talking another woman about how much she wished she had a boy instead. "Boys are some much less of a hassle to deal' with," she said with as much disdain in her voice as yours had when you spoke to me.

What about the brunette beauty whose only friend treated her like an insignificant bug crawling across her granite counter tops? I could've thrown that exact statement in her face. I could've made her feel as little as she made me feel, just because she knew it saved her from the same fate. Would it have saved me from future 'bullying'? No, I probably would've made the situation worst for myself. It would've been worth it though, I think. This was the start of my pulling away from everyone I met.

Throughout the coming years, the way I presented myself would come off one of two ways: shy or rude. Half of the people I've encountered know me as the shy girl with depth and the other half knows me as the stand-off girl with the horrible attitude. I'm okay with either, to be honest. I've come to the realization that people are going to label you however they see fit. If they can't get passed their first impression of you, then they're not meant to be in your life. Now, this doesn't make them bad people, it makes them human. Although, most would disagree with this statement, people are allowed to judge others however they see fit. No one person can control the thoughts of another person. That being said, if someone is infringing on your right to live by shoving their opinions and ideas down your throat, that's not okay. Ever. This is where the three "R's" come in.

After a while of keeping to myself, I learned that there is no way to live inside yourself. I don't mean being introverted is a bad thing, but when it gets to a point where you never let yourself let anyone else in to your life it starts becomes self-harming behavior. I truly believe that everyone needs someone. Whether they're family, a friend, a partner, everyone needs another person to keep them somewhat grounded to the real world. But, how can you do that when you're stuck between talking to much and not talking at all? You adapt. You don't need to change yourself but you need to find a responsible, reasonable and respectable way to get your thoughts across to people so that they look at you as someone who is worth a second glance. If you know you're worth, they will see it too.

I hear people say all the time that "if someone doesn't see your worth, they're not worthy of you." This is never something you should tell anyone, ever. This is how we create self-absorbed youth that thinks everyone needs to put up with whatever we dish out. As an individual, you need to present yourself in a way that shows people that you're worth their time and affection. This does include a certain leave of vulnerability that most people do find hard to have. That's okay. I'm not saying that you should just go out and tell everyone your deepest secrets or do anything you're uncomfortable with. I'm just saying that if we present ourselves as upstanding members of society, we will all be more inclined to treat each other with the respect everyone deserves. If we can all learn the three "R's," communicating with each other will become more rewarding and self enlightening than needlessly arguing and bashing each other into solitude.