This article has a lot of spoilers, so don't read if you haven't seen the movie!

Fresh off the plane from Tulsa after break, two of my guy friends and I hit up the local theater to go see "La La Land," the new old-fashioned musical winning awards left and right. It was definitely worth the price of Saturday night tickets, with fresh and catchy songs (a weekend later and all three of us are still singing them), lots of tributes to classic films like Sleeping Beauty and Singing in the Rain, and a heartbreakingly relatable storyline for many artists. All three of us sitting in the seats together were artists that chose the practical route instead of chasing our dreams of music, novel-writing, and filmmaking respectively. When Mia broke down in front of her house, shouting at Seb that it hurt too much to try anymore, I felt like she was repeating things I'd said before.

However, in the midst of the bright colors and beautiful cinematography, something sadder struck me about the film. It reflects the classic films that inspired it, but the biggest thing that differs is the relationship around which the film orbits.

At the end of "La La Land," Mia and Seb separate, because neither see a future with each other as they have both changed and as they would not be able to pursue their dreams as easily together. And while in our day and age this might be lauded as realistic, it also is a sad reflection on our perspective of relationships today as opposed to the age of jazz musicals.

When you are in a relationship with someone, you change. It's a part of the bargain. But it seems that change, whether external or internal but especially internal, is enough of a reason to break up with someone. I'm not intending to judge anyone's circumstances, but rather give some food for thought. We find other films like Up sweet and idealistic because Carl and Ellie stuck it through together despite everything, whether that be financial trouble, a miscarriage, or being unable to fulfill their own dream of traveling to South America. That's real love. Real love is an active selflessness where you learn to grow and fight what comes your way together, where you learn to love your significant other despite yourselves and your situations. There's no magic formula that you will become a famous star or get what you want if you break up with someone or if you stay with them, but relationships should be about "we" and not "me." Otherwise, they're just an attachment with infatuation instead of actual love.

There is a balance. It's not smart to plan your entire life around one person. That's a lot of pressure on them and leaves no place for you to fall on if it doesn't work out. However, we shouldn't just leave someone because "they've changed" (as part of the reason they've changed is you) or because you think you'll have a better shot at getting what you want from life without them.

So go watch "La La Land." Love it. But make Up's Carl and Ellie your goals instead of Seb and Mia.