Rules for dining

• A dude’s capacity for eating pancakes almost always exceeds a sister’s capacity for making them.

• When a dude is thirsty, the beverage options in order of preference are A. Cold beer B. Pepsi or coke. C. Any other sugary drink. D. Anything that is not water. E. In direst circumstances, Water (that you do not have to pay for).

• The concept of eating three meals a day does not apply to a dude. A dude eats only if hungry
• 

• And, a dude is always hungry and ready to eat something.
• *Exception: unless he is still enjoying the taste of what he has just eaten in his mouth.

• A home without potato chips and soda is just a cold, empty house.

• A dude may sulk and cry only when his favorite fast food restaurant goes bankrupt (RIP Bahafresh)

• A dude would rather drink bad vodka straight up than make a cocktail. Cocktails are feminine things and might rob a dude of his dudehood. Other miscellaneous rules

• Dishes do not need to be washed after each meal. Twice a week is good.

• When a dude is on vacation, fatigue is a myth (unless the dude himself and not just his friends, is tired).
• The toilet seat does not go down.
• When the sister goes to bed, dudes are free to indulge in at least 45 min of uninterrupted dude time. I doubt that any human female will be able to uncover the secrets of this dude time by legal methods.
• Dudes do not say thank you; Gratitude is expressed in the form of nods of approval or satisfied.

• Here is how dudes categorize cinema A. Action movies. B. Comedy movies. C. The Shawshank Redemption D. Bullshit.
  
  Rules related to girls and feminine things.

• A dude does not read labels on beauty products. It is up to the girls to explain why face wash with moisturizer is actually a kind of cleansing agent and not lotion.
• A dude does not buy chapstick but depends upon the women around him to maintain a constant supply of chapstick.
• Dudes really cannot tell when a girl is wearing makeup, unless it is painfully obvious in which case makeup is gross.
• When two dudes are walking and they see a girl wearing tights, they must admire her bottoms. If the sister is with them, they try to do it furtively.
• Rom-coms are the purest form of bullshit known to cinema.

• Bros before hoes. (This was an input from the two dudes).

• It is perfectly acceptable to online stalk any pretty girl you see on facebook, as long as you do not attempt to contact her. For further reading, please consult Barney Stinson's The Bro Code. It is the definitive guide to bro hood (or so I have been told) and is far more entertaining than the list above).

• Oh and please also excuse any typos.