College: a sea of Rubinoff vodka by the handle and light beer accompanied by the indubitable and slightly unhygienic hook-up culture that no one outside of college really talks about. There are no Cosmo advice columns for your frisky lifestyle, and certainly no one to offer you face-to-face experience without expressing some kind of regret. Before college you cluelessly anticipated it, during college you absorbed it, but the moment you walk across the stage wearing a cap and gown, it is immediately forgotten and labeled as “past,” never to be returned to.
The four years students spend at their university is the precious segue between childhood and adulthood, and for some, life’s best years. Freshmen are suddenly thrown into this pool of people just like them with the freedom of an adult and the responsibilities of a toddler. In order to stay afloat in this jungle of lewd young adults, as long as your academics can afford it, you can’t resist playing the game. The one who racks up the most crazy stories wins… right?
All seems fine and dandy until a few months of going out without a care in sight pass before you know it. Your Friday nights blend with your Saturday nights and although you think you’ve found your favorite spots to have a good time, you are also bored of the chaos of flirting in crowded places. The insanity becomes your monotonous routine. Each night seems to run into the previous and they all start to feel the same. It is then that something changes. Suddenly you realize you are home alone and you can’t even remember the name of your last sexual partner. Your motives reform.
I’ve found this trend in almost everyone I know. They start out college testing a whole lot of waters, but then they look back and realize they all felt the same; lukewarm and trivial. No one-night-stand led to anything else, that is, besides the few that lingered and ended in a splash of drama or misconduct. You realize you are dying for some kind of consistency in the people coming in and out of your life. It isn’t just in your sexual endeavors either- you’re ready to solidify your group of friends and maybe even hang out with them during the light of day. And as for members of the opposite sex… well you just don’t quite know what you want. All you know is that you are tired of what lifestyle you’ve been leading lately and want a change.
But you’re in college so what are your options?
It turns out that almost everyone I’ve talked to is on the same page. They don’t exactly know what they want, except they are realizing the existence of a severe discontent in whatever they are currently doing. Some start reminiscing about their old relationships and miss the consistency and dare I say it… romance.
It’s all about the romance. They miss waking up next to a dewy eyed significant other, knowing their full name and where they’re from, and maybe even holding a hand every once in a while. Although the idea of monotony still seems frightening and distant to them, compatibility would be a dream-come-true.
But how on earth does one achieve romance without the commitment? Is it something that only comes separately, or can we have our cake and eat it too?
