Everyone grows up at different rates. We are all fifteen and irresponsible at one time, and some of us remain this way longer than others. We grow up together, usually with our friends and the people around us. It may not be very noticeable to see how we've grown ourselves, or to even see how those who were there the entire way grew.
I've personally had a unique relationship with one of my best friends for the past five years. Madison is a year younger than me in school, so we didn't have classes together or even see each other a regular amount everyday. Most relationships in high school exist because of convenience and the fact that we are forced to sit in the same classrooms together everyday. My friendship with Maddie actually stemmed from an introduction through her sister Kennedy (another beautiful human being) and in that way it was different from other friendships I had.
I didn't watch Maddie interact with people every single day, I didn't firsthand see her in various high school situations, and we were separated for long periods of time more often than with others. This unique situation allowed me to watch the beautiful process of one of my best friends growing up.
In high school, we were all quite different from where we are now. I'm no different, I'm basically Emily 2.0 compared to who I was back then. I don't let other people affect me, I don't compare myself to others, and I don't make a big deal out of small issues as much anymore. These are just a few behaviors I'm sure many teenage girls have been prone to. I remember talking to Maddie about situations in her life and wanting nothing more than to make the bad go away. In a way her life affected me and just as it affected her. To both of us, so many of the situations felt like the end of the world. I remember seeing this beautiful girl who couldn't quite see her worth and wanting to do nothing more than to show her the same mirror I saw. We were always there for one another when we needed it.
Our friendship has never been perfect, of course. We got into little disagreements from time to time about anything from advice to miscommunications of facts. However even from my own 17-year-old self in need of change and growth, I always thought it was important for us to make our own mistakes and learn on our own. You can tell somebody something a million times but if they don't experience it themselves, then they can never fully understand it. We sometimes disagreed, but we still lived our lives in unison.
Maddie and I would get together with our other friends from time to time and life would go on normally as we each made our own mistakes. It killed me whenever anybody did anything to hurt my best friend, but I could see each offense was really saving her and helping her grow. (I'm pretty sure this was a mutual feeling, as I can recall a specific incident where Maddie comforted me for two hours at 9 o'clock on a Sunday morning in my time of need. And the rest of the day as she watched "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" with me.)
Time went on and I went off to college and she entered her senior year of high school. In retrospect, this year kind of feels like it was a blur for many reasons. Maddie and I probably only saw each other two times that entire school year. (Hello Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato concerts!) Still we texted and stayed in touch, updating one another on our lives every once in a while. She still vented to me and I still made "Friends" references to her every other text, so in a way nothing changed.
And then comes the blessing of learning that Maddie decided to come to IUPUI to pursue her education. I didn't know anyone from my high school in college, so to not only have someone from home, but a best friend, was too perfect. This year was really a chance to reconnect. This was when I finally started to see how drastically and incredibly she had grown up.
Maddie let go of many negative people in her life. She let them stop defining how she saw herself. She was responsible and dependable. She was sensible and level-headed. She believed in herself. She let someone stop hurting her once and for all. She became who she really was.
And as it happens, all of this doesn't just occur at once. It's a process. I looked back and could see the signs of her gaining her sense of self. I've always admired Maddie for her strength and perseverance, but now she is someone I can say I always look up to, even if she's younger than me.
I had the privilege of watching a teenage Madison grow into this powerful, confident woman. The girl I talked to about our problems in high school is now the woman who edits for The Odyssey at IUPUI. She's only a year into college and she has already made something great of herself. I'm sure Maddie has her own recollections of watching me grow up, but I can say for myself that I feel so fortunate to be able to see my best friend really find herself.
(Note: In the above picture Madison wears the same outfit I wore in the first picture two years later: a timeless friendship, a timeless outfit.)


























