Mirrors are complicated objects. I know you are thinking how can a mirror be complicated if it just reflects an image? The mirror is complicated because of exactly that, the image. So, on that note I would like to begin with something a little difficult, so just follow along for now, please. A famous psychoanalyst named Jacques Lacan stated in his essay titled "The Mirror Stage as Formative" that “we only have to understand the mirror stage as an identification…This form would have to be called the Ideal-I’ and ‘the important point is that this form situates the agency of the ego” (Lacan). I know you’re probably confused right now, and that is totally okay because I’m going to explain what that actually means.

Seeing ourselves in the mirror constitutes the act of identification where we consciously recognize who we are based upon our features and expressions. This is crucial because this shows that we are somewhat intelligent, and that we have the capability to discern ourselves as a human rather than let us say a lamp. This is important because this recognition begins to slowly build upon how we see ourselves. Growing up I have always been told to look at myself in the mirror to imagine what I’d look like in five, 10 years down the road, and I am positive y’all have had the same experience. Now, here is the tricky part to this simple action. This imagined glance forward is the “Ideal-I” it’s the ideal version of ourselves that we wish to be someday. And in the process of journeying towards our imagined Ideal-I it is the realistic image in the mirror that then establishes our ego, our personality per say.

I can say that after years of looking in the mirror I have never reached my Ideal-I. For many people, their Ideal-I’s are different as some may involve weight loss, weight gain or some other personal goal of the individual. I can attest to Lacan’s statement about the formation of the ego as I, too predicated my ego simply based upon how I looked in the mirror. It isn’t healthy to do this, but inevitably some of us do. Some are lucky to walk past a mirror without a second glance; however, I am one who is not so lucky. I consciously believe that mirrors are a trap; yet, I unconsciously walk into it them every time. I had become so focused on my Ideal-I that every time I looked into the mirror I became once more aware that I have not achieved it. It is disheartening to say the least. However, I recently had an “aha” moment, and my light bulb above my head finally clicked on.

You see, I realized I was too focused on the day-to-day comparison of myself to actually see the progress that I was making. I was blind to the changes, and my ego drooped because I saw the chances of me becoming my Ideal-I slip further and further from my grasp. My “aha” moment came just recently after I successfully tested for my blue belt in martial arts. I was shown video of my progress from when I was a white belt to my current stage of training, and the improvement was surprising because I never saw it in myself. I believe for those struggling to see or ascertaining their Ideal-I that rather than focusing on day-to-day progress to focus instead on the journey. The right ego comes in time, and forming your ego around who you think you are today can be dangerous. The mirror is powerful because it can show if you let it, how far you are away from who you want to be. I challenge you to take down the mirrors you see everyday, and to trust the journey ahead. Getting wrapped up in the minute changes takes away from your evolution as a whole. I challenge you to be happy with the progress you have made towards your Ideal-I, and to see yourself as your own version of Michelangelo’s David slowly emerging from the marble slab.