You watch endlessly as GoFundMe's appear for medical bills, surgeries, and support. You see a million comments; "you are in my prayers!" "Sending thoughts!" and then suddenly you're in Nebraska working at a summer camp and your mom texts to let you know that your twin sister was admitted into the hospital. And then I was the family on the other end of the GoFundMe.

You can always read stories about the person. The person that survived the illness, survived the trauma, or is living with a chronic illness. But I am on the other end of the hospital bed.

My twin's illness has effected her life in ways I won't even try to describe. She now has a feeding tube from not getting enough nutrition and is in constant stomach pain. The pain she has felt in immense beyond words. But her illness has effected my life in ways not often talked about. I am always watching her with fear and worry in my eyes. If her feeding tube machine's alarm goes off, I know exactly what buttons to press; I know what pills she has to take for the certain kinds of pain she endures, and I have ridden in the front seat of an ambulance on the way to the hospital, lights flashing. We are attached at the hip and have been since we were kids, and I protect her with every piece of me.

Besides caring for my sister, having a sibling with a chronic illness isn't easy. I get lost in the shuffle of discussions with my friends asking, "oh how's your sister?" and no one stopping to ask me how I was doing. I often feel like my peers forget I exist, walking up to my sister and telling her she's so strong and brave, but they don't seem to understand that I'm going through this too. I struggle immensely with feeling left out and hurt, although I know I shouldn't, my sister has a feeding tube after all, there's not much room for me to complain.

My twin sister is my very best friend in the entire world and watching her go through this is one of the worst things I have ever endured. The pain I feel, watching her go from doctor to doctor, praying for answers we know may never come. I wish constantly that even just a small amount of her pain could be given to me, so she could be spared some of her pain.

I have watched for months as my twin sister and favorite person in the whole world gets sicker and sicker, watched her go from doctor to doctor, sometimes coming home in tears. I have seen her in pain so harsh that she couldn't speak and so tired she can barely move. She is the most incredible person I know and I wouldn't trade being her number one supporter and helper, even if it does forever go unnoticed.