Everything was great for the first six months. It was like your typical fairy tale story of us being on cloud nine. We couldn't get enough of each other. That was until one night, everything changed. We both decided to go to a house party with a friend. After seeing how drunk we all were, our friend offered her place for us to crash. We all slept in the same bed, so it was a little cramped. After settling down and getting comfortable, I started to doze off...until movement from the bed woke me up. I woke up to our friend making a move on my girlfriend, while I was laying right next to her. I couldn't believe my eyes, but of course just days after, I brushed it under the rug and moved on.

I naturally have a soft heart and I'm quick at forgiving. I just made myself see it as a drunken night with minds not in the right state. So, three months after that happened we all got together again. After a night with dinner and movies we went back to the house we were all staying at. I went to lay down for a second in the room, but while doing that I noticed silence in the living room where they both were. So I got up to check it out. By no surprise, I caught them making out. Can you tell I am one to give people too many chances? I am not the one to cause a scene so I just grabbed my things and walked out. How could I be so blind and put myself back in the same situation?

Sitting three years into my relationship, there was not a day that passed by that I didn't second guess her love for me after what happened. I was in the worse state of mind. I couldn't let go of that feeling that they were still talking. So I searched for information and got a hold of my girlfriends phone records. I read that they were talking every night while she was at work. Literally every moment she was not with me she was stuck on the phone with her. Finding that out drove me crazy. So I got a hold of the other woman and she agreed to meet up with me.

We met at an ice cream shop in town late one night and talked. I wanted the answers from her that I wasn't getting from my girlfriend. She gave me what I wanted and a whole lot more then I was expecting. She confessed to have been in the picture since that first moment I caught them. So they have kept this going on for close to three years. She let me know that they weren't just on a physical connection anymore but an emotional one too. I held my tears in that just wanted to spill out like a waterfall.

At first she kept beating around the bush. Then she started spitting out straight forward answers to me. She apologized to my face for all she has caused and from that moment forward she would let us be and step out of this messed up situation. Her word on that was one that I could not trust. In that moment I was more sad at what I found out with the lies and secrets rather than being so angry at her. I did give her respect for confessing the truth to me.

Two years passed, my girlfriend and I tried to move on from it. But our relationship ended and that's when the truth came out. The other woman never left. She stayed around even after our talk. So she was in our relationship for almost five years. In the end, I was left for the other woman.

During that time I was so lost and desperate for answers that I went to the extreme. Even seeing it with my own eyes and hearing it all, I still refused to see the reality of it. I had built up so much anger towards the other woman for messing up my fairy tale story. I took it all out on her and blamed my girlfriend for none of it. There was just this fire inside me that was slowly killing the best parts of me. I couldn't go a day without wishing the worse for that girl. Everything I had worked for was just being taken right underneath me and I was letting it happen without a fight back.

I was starting to breathe ways of making the other woman's life a living hell like she did to mine. I wanted her to feel the pain that I was put through. Those worried nights when my mind was my worst enemy. I wanted her to get a taste of her own medicine and then some. It was like I had become this cold heartless girl. A girl who wanted to live for revenge and hoped for karma to work faster. I'd become a girl who was lost in hate..a girl who wasn't me.

Today, being in a place of peace and with a better mindset, I can now reflect back on it all and release the hate in my heart. Being able to look at the person I once was, was the biggest eye opening moment I've had. It just took too much out of me to keep that anger bottled up inside. She was physically out of my life but mentally she still owned my mind. I didn't want her to have that control over me anymore.

I became extremely exhausted from carrying such a heavy thing like that inside me. I wanted better for myself. I wanted ME back. Growth is the main thing I strive for everyday. Especially with me coming to peace with everyone around me. I just don't have it in me anymore to keep going down that dark path. So I forgave the other woman and my ex girlfriend for putting me through that. I truly do.

I am realizing that we all make mistakes. Life is full of those. We all just want happiness in life. That happiness that makes you want to scream like a little girl and throw glitter in the air while it falls onto your hair. This will be the hardest sentence to type but..I am happy that they found happiness in each other. I am becoming more mature and grown enough to see beyond it all. So I thank her for teaching me a valuable lesson.The other woman was the gift I didn't know I needed.