When we met I never thought that it would be you. We had been friends for a while, a long while, years to be exact. And I thought that was it because I had never imagined us as anything more. But as it turns out, it wasn't. As we started to mature things began to change. We grew closer, stronger, more in sync. Until eventually it happened. We were together. And it came as a shock.
I still remember the night. The night that everything changed. I remember we were standing by my car talking for an hour because we weren't ready to say goodnight. I was happy then. I was happy with the boy who made me laugh, with the boy who made me blush, with the boy who was now mine. I went through a whirlwind of emotions all at once and I didn't even notice. But like most relationships, the so-called "honeymoon phase" slowly began to fade away and reality began to set in. You had work, I had my team, and we both had responsibilities to our families. That was when I first began to realize that I was scared. Scared of you, of me, of us, of what we were becoming.
On paper, we should have been close to perfect for each other. So why weren't we?
We had been best friends, we knew everything about each other, so I didn't know why we didn't make it. I know I had my own fears, but did you? Did we just get the timing wrong? Or was I just your practice run before heading off to college? I will probably never know the answer to these questions. But I am OK with that. I have changed since high school. I have matured and have been finding out who I am supposed to be. Despite the fact that we have parted, that doesn't mean that I have forgotten. I won't forget your sense of humor, your laugh, or the way you used to look at me. Like you actually cared for me and thought I was beautiful.
Going to college has changed me, as I'm sure it has you. Certain events occur and force you to think back. Which is why I am writing this. There is no ill-will, no hard feelings, no regrets. I was glad to have you in my life. I am sorry I wasn't who you wanted, but I hope you know I will always care. You couldn't save me. As it turned out I needed to be my own Prince Charming. And the more I learn about who I truly am, the better I got. We were young, stupid, and clueless. I don't know about you, but I had no clue what real love feels like. What we had was probably puppy love. And that's OK. Most high school couples are. All I have is one request. Stay happy. You deserve it.
All my love,
The girl you used to know
