Girls: Do you find yourself wondering why you aren’t getting hand written letters every day of the year, flowers delivered to your doorstep or a man who will sit outside your window holding his retro boom-box, serenading you untill you swoon? Guys: Are you finding the once simple task of winning a girl over or impressing a girl an impossible feat?
I am here to tell you that this problem is not a coincidence. Rather this is an epidemic that, through conditioning and training, has changed the idea of love and relationships as we know it. Assisted by the help of authors and directors of the late 20th and early 21st century, young adults and teens alike have been given the idea that love and relationships are not only something that comes easy, but are available and offered by everyone in the same manner.
With movies such as “The Notebook” and “The Fault in our Stars," the female population has been given more and more reason to long and search for a love that definitely doesn't exist. Furthermore, the remaining male population who hasn’t been discouraged through this disease is now faced with ridiculous expectations and girls who are always going to be looking for something more.
Don’t get me wrong: I am just as victim to this epidemic as the next girl. I will not deny that I, as well as many girls I know, have longed and are still longing for the care and love that are received by Allie and Hazel in their fantastical worlds on the screen. However, I am also here to say that as women, we need to pull ourselves together. As much as we want to deny it, the likelihood that we will meet an “Augustus Waters” at some point in our lifetime is very unlikely.
Why, you may ask? Well, for one thing, these men are made up; they are well thought out and carefully formed characters that are created for the sole purpose of wooing readers and gaining profit. These authors know from experience that no matter how unrealistic these love stories may be and how depressed these plot lines may make their audience, as soon as the next movie or book makes its way to the public, these same blubbering messes from the audience prior will continue to come back and long for what they will most likely not find.
Gosh, does this sound depressing. But, I want to finish with a silver lining. Sure Hazel and other fictional heroines have found their Prince Charming, but that just means exactly that: those men were their prince, not yours. There is someone out there for you that, whether you want to believe or not, is above and beyond any Augustus or Noah some author could think up. So ladies, never lower your standards; this is not what I am getting at. However, never stop giving chances. While you think you have seen the man of your dreams on the big screen, there are men out there who you have not even thought of yet. So keep on searching for your knight in shining armor and write your own love story: while it may never make its way to the box office, no love story will ever match what your future has waiting for you