Move over, ladies and gents, because there’s a new sheriff town. Well, a different dynamic when it comes to relationships these days I should say. It’s not just about you and ‘bae’ anymore. It’s you, your significant other, and that third wheel you just can’t seem to get rid of:
Social media.
Now, before you raise an eyebrow, cock your head to the side, or show that first paragraph to your friends and discuss how I don’t make any sense, consider these questions. Have you ever received that daunting text from your partner asking, “Hey, what was that tweet/post about?” Have you ever gotten into an argument over your social media or theirs? Have you ever requested passwords for their social media sites or received the request? Has your partner ever gotten jealous over an innocent interaction or something that was posted? Have YOU gotten jealous? No worries, these things are shockingly normal behaviors in the age of social media. These sites have managed to wedge themselves in between many couples and in some cases, have even ruined relationships. And let me tell you why.
Social media allows our generation to connect to people anywhere in the world in a matter of seconds without leaving the comfort of our beds. We are able to develop friendships and even romantic relationships with people we may have never crossed paths with. To some, that ability to connect instantaneously with as many people as one desires is exciting and addicting. But to many people in serious relationships, social media creates quite a bit of room for trust issues, jealousy, and detachment.
Social media exposes you and your partner to thousands of people worldwide. To many people, that simply means there’s more competition. Some feel threatened by the amount of people their partner may communicate with through social media or how often they communicate with others. This can easily generate feelings of distrust and suspicion, two things I think every relationship could do without.
“Who is he talking to?”
“Why has she been tweeting him so often?”
“Are they DMing?”
It’s enough to drive anyone crazy. On top of that, social media is becoming quite an addiction. How many times have you been on a date and the person constantly checked their phone or scrolled through social media sites? An even better question is; why didn’t that behavior seem out of the ordinary? Behavior, such as this, happens so often that it is now accepted and expected. Nine times out of ten, you’re doing the exact same thing. We allow social media to drag us away from our dates, from our movie nights because we’d rather tweet about how tragic The Notebook ending is or put it on Snapchat with the caption “#RelationshipGoals” than to actually enjoy the movie and the time with our partner. The mentions, comments, likes and shares are becoming increasingly important, and our connections with our partners suffer because of it. People have become accustomed to seeking attention and validation from followers instead of their special someone. Just like any other drug, our generation is chasing the ‘high’ social media provides, the pleasure from the attention and from feeling popular and liked. Relationships suffer as a result.
Social media can be extremely beneficial and positive. Important things to remember to avoid social media problems are having a clear understanding of boundaries within a relationship, being considerate of what is being posted, and being open and honest about social media while still respecting one another’s privacy.
Don’t let the third wheel ruin your relationship.
