You have bills to pay.
I’ve been paying for my car insurance my phone bill since I was 18 years old. Since then, it’s become more difficult because I’m not able to work as much – due to college being a number one priority these days. I struggle more than others when it comes to school, so working is kind of a hard one to balance when it comes to exams, quizzes, essays, projects, papers, reading, the whole nine yards. There have been times where I have been literally scared to death that I won’t be able to pay the things I have to each month. It’s a reminder that I’m failing at what I’m doing – but honestly, I’m trying. It just gets immensely stressful and exhausting. I want to be able to easily pay for my things, as well as doing good in school and keeping a decent GPA. But for me, and for some others, that’s a challenge. It's like this endless torturous cycle that I want to disappear into thin air. Now. Please!
You're poor.
This was kind of explained in the one above about paying bills. I don’t know what it is about being in your twenties and being broke as a joke, but it’s all too real – unless you’re one of those spoiled rich children with trust funds. intensely glaring at you. Sometimes, I’ll be happy to have at least $10 in my checking account, and I try very hard not to take money out of my savings. But I’m still learning, and resisting the urge to dip into my savings for that cute new outfit at Forever 21 is such a struggle – you girls know what I’m talking about. And when you DO dip into that money, those happy feelings soon fade away because you’re left with the lingering guilt. I'm constantly scrounging around for loose change to do my laundry, or I'll get excited if I find a five dollar bill randomly floating around in my wallet. Paying off college after you graduate and being in debt.
You think about being in debt after college.
I don’t even want to think about this dark, dreary and depressing place – but too late, because I already have. stares blankly out into space. My mom has reminded me multiple times that I’m going to have to pay back everything after I graduate, and it might take until I’m forty years old. Gee mom, thanks for that. I know that she’s just looking out for me and making sure I know what I’m getting myself into, but then again – it doesn’t really help. I kind of already knew what I was walking into, and I knew that I’d have to pay thousands of dollars for an education (like, why!?!?!) but now that I’m getting older, it’s becoming more surreal.
You're in a weird, in-between stage.
It’s like you’re an adult, but you sometimes still get help from your family members when paying for things, paying off things, etc. When you go home to your family and all of you go out to dinner, your mom still pays for your meal. But when you’re back on campus, you feel more independent and you pay for basically all of your meals on your own. It’s a weird thing, being twenty-one, being stuck on this weird bridge. And quite frankly, it’s awkward and I don’t really like it.
Older people say "It's going to get worse".
As I collapse onto the table in front of a bunch of “been there, done that” old timers, I exclaim, with a sigh in my voice, “Can I be a little kid again!?” In response, the said old timers say “Oh, it gets worse from here. This is just the beginning”. Oh. Thank you. Thank you for reminding me. You know, you didn’t have to actually say that because I wasn’t really looking for an answer. It was more of a rhetorical question. I will appreciate you and I know that you’re just trying to spread some wisdom onto me, but I didn’t really gain anything from it EXCEPT MORE STRESS AND ANXIETY THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
Your schedule is hectic and overwhelming.
Wake up at 6:30 in the morning.
Go to all of the classes.
Get to that interview.
Write that resume and cover letter for the internship of your dreams.
Cry because the world is one giant competition.
Cry because you're exhausted.
Eat. Eat. Eat.
Get to math tutoring.
Sob over the struggles of numbers.
Repeat.
Repeat.
Repeat.
You have expectations to meet.
I was on academic probation last semester, and I just got off of it with a good standing GPA, and even landed on the Dean’s List. Those are two things that I have never accomplished before – so it’s pretty overwhelming. Now that I’ve done that, I’ve kind of put myself on a pedestal and if I don’t achieve those goals like last semester, I’ll come down hard. I don’t want to be disappointed in myself, and I don’t want to fail myself. I have all of these expectations but thinking about them all at once makes me go insane.
You lose this sense of childhood.
I now secretly envy my four-year-old sister because she can go to pre-k, take naps in class after watch The Lion King, eat snacks, draw and paint and play outside 24/7. Embrace it, kid. I wish I could just go hide under my blankets for awhile with my blanket and a juice box. Those were the days… looks on sentimentally
You feel like you fail everything.
Oh, I failed this? Oh, I did bad on that? Oh awesome, I didn’t pay that on time – my math skills are so terrible, how couldn’t I have figured that out?
…but you have to remember that you’re doing your best.
Breathe. You’re obviously not perfect – nobody is. Yeah, it’s overused and it’s a cliché, but it can get the job done because it’s exceptionally one hundred percent true.
You’re young and you’re still figuring out this adult stuff while balancing a social life, and a personal life on your own, as well. I’m honestly very stressed out right now – as school is going on week three. But, I don’t want to forget that I’m putting in the most effort that I can right now, and it’ll only go up from here. It’s all a learning process, don’t forget that. It’s not like someone is a pro expert in “adulting” right?
If you need me, I’ll be under my covers hiding from reality. I just need a moment in my cave, that’s all.
man running in forestPhoto by 
