The Mind Of A Girl With An Eating Disorder

To Recover or Not To Recover, that is the question:

Does she continue down the path that has made her so depressed or does she do what is best for her body?

Who is she really doing this for? Does she do this for herself? Or does she do this for her family?

So many questions, so many emotions running through her head, nothing is clear and nothing makes sense.

Why her? Did she do this to herself? She thought she was in control; She is in control.

Or is she? She doesn't know anymore, what is up, what is down, what is good and what is bad.

Black and White, the lines are blurred. What is healthy and what is not?

She does not know. But does her family know? How does she fix a problem that seems to have no end in sight? It seems as if we cannot undo what had been done within ourselves. But sometimes you can.

Even if she is doing it to make the others in her life content and unbothered by her health, The problem fixes over time, she just needs to make the decision.

To purge, or to become healthy again, to gain the weight back that she worked so hard to lose, to make her ribs invisible to the world instead of sticking her hand under them as if it is a party trick, to be healthy enough to give blood to those who need it, and to get rid of the greenish tint to her face.

She may not be in control of her body, but she is in control of this one choice. Make a choice. Make a change.