As the first born and natural leader of the DeMallie trio, I take my job as "Pseudo Parent" very seriously. I’m sure there have been times when you have been jealous of me because being the oldest sibling does have its perks:
- I don’t own hand-me-downs.
- The photographic record of my childhood is extensive.
- I get to partake in adult activities before you guys.
- I was the first to know about Santa Claus and other well-kept secrets.
- And, I will always be the “one left in charge.”
However, being the oldest child also has some drawbacks:
- Believe it or not, there used to be rules in our house. I had a bedtime that was strictly enforced. I was only allowed to have dessert on weekends. I drank milk with every meal. I could only watch one and a half hours of TV per day. Life was rough. I got my first phone in 9th grade, and for the record, it was a QWERTY keyboard flip phone AND I only had 250 texts per month. I also didn’t watch PG 13 movies until I was 13. So let’s just say things are much less strict now.
- I have always been the guinea pig: I was the trial run kid. Lucky for you, Mom and Dad learned from me. For example, I don’t recall Mom limiting your access to children’s scissors or correcting your kindergarten handwriting.
- I was the first to do everything from surviving middle school drama to applying to college. I found myself constantly yearning for an older sibling…so next time I am rambling about how to live your life, listen. I promise I am just trying to help.
- My responsibilities were much more extensive than yours. Who was always in charge of organizing the playroom? Me. Who would vacuum the entire house while you had to merely make your beds? Me. Who picked you up from a friend’s house late at night? Oh right, me. I’ve been the chauffeur, the babysitter, part-time maid and the snack-time chef since day one.
- Somehow the oldest always gets blamed. Remember our intense arguments that often resulted in yelling, screaming, and the occasional act of physical aggression? Yeah, well, while you two were given a hug and kiss, I was “supposed to know better” or “be the bigger person.”
- And although you guys may not realize it, there is a lot of pressure on the oldest child. From the time I was little, I was told to “set the example.” I always felt like I needed to be perfect because I had two younger people looking up to me.
I wish more than anything that I could be with you right now. As your big sister, I feel like I have abandoned you. You two have been left alone to suffer through Dad’s political rants and Mom’s cleaning sessions. I want to go to your concerts, watch marathons of Dance Moms and play one too many games of ERS after school. You may drive me crazy, make fun of me on a regular basis, and take advantage of my driver’s license, but I love you anyways.
I know it hasn’t been easy to follow in my footsteps - I apologize for setting the bar high. However, I hope you realize that you both are special in your own way. You can look up to me without trying to be me. Believe it or not, I am not a perfect person. Learn from my mistakes, listen to my advice, and strive to be the best version of yourself.
I have watched both of you blossom into two remarkable individuals, and the thought of you two growing up any more makes me a bit teary-eyed. Know that no matter where life takes me, I will always be thinking about you. And as your big sister, I promise to be available for long talks about school, friends, high school drama, physics tests, relationships, parents and everything in between.
Thanks for making me a big sister. I think it’s the best job I’ll ever have.
Love you lots,
Katie
